Carers allowance

morning everyone.

i have a question for you all.... my 9 yr old was diagnosed with autism in june, hes at the higher functioning end of it. we were told we wouldnt get a diagnosis as he had traits,but not enough ( ed psych said this) anyway he got the diagnosis after being seen by autism assesment team. 

i wasnt overly surprised as he has always been a different & difficult child.

ive gone through so many emotions since diagnosis- releif, guilt, sadness etc.

we applied for and got Dla, which is helpfull & family are now telling me to go for carers allowance .

the problem i have is i feel guilty.i feel guilty for accepting money for my child-even the dla money i have guilt over, yes its for him and it is helping- but i feel like im cheating somehow?

i can see why they want me to apply for it, as i deal with him, suffer his anger, physical & verbal abuse & ive suffered with depression a while ago because of him.

maybe i wouldnt have the guilt over it if he was physicaly disabled or seriously ill, he looks like any other little boy his age -till he cant cope then it all goes incredibly wrong!

when hes ok hes a great kid, couldnt be nicer, but other times he can be incredibly nasty and violent.

do / did other parents feel this way too??

 

Parents
  • thanks Intenseworld,

    your words have made me feel better, i guess because its hidden is partly why i feel guilty- like its not a "proper" illness- even though i know it is and the challenges we have & face each day.

    one good thing the diagnosis has thrown up is family discussion and talks, and we have identified that my dad & older brother definatly have similar traits to my son- they have both agreed that they are probably on the spectrum too.

    it has also helped me to come to terms with how my brother treated me as a child - i bore the brunt of his anger & hatred , so there is obviously a strong genetic link.

    thankyou again xx

     

Reply
  • thanks Intenseworld,

    your words have made me feel better, i guess because its hidden is partly why i feel guilty- like its not a "proper" illness- even though i know it is and the challenges we have & face each day.

    one good thing the diagnosis has thrown up is family discussion and talks, and we have identified that my dad & older brother definatly have similar traits to my son- they have both agreed that they are probably on the spectrum too.

    it has also helped me to come to terms with how my brother treated me as a child - i bore the brunt of his anger & hatred , so there is obviously a strong genetic link.

    thankyou again xx

     

Children
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