Meltdown advice needed for my 4 year old son.

Hi everyone.

My 4 year old son is now starting his 4th week at his mainstream primary school, and he has just recieved a working diagnosis of autism. We are very proud of how he has handled this transition from nursery to primary, and each day he is happy to go to school.

Our main concern is the occurance of meltdowns in the classroom and how it is handled. These meltdowns are quite new to my husband and I - I guess because we automatically know what might upset our son and so we naturally avoid or distract him from them. A meltdown usually occurs because of suprises/ change in routine.

By all means we try very hard to liase with teacher/ teaching assistants, but we feel they are inexperienced in dealing with autism. We are all presently active in get outside services in etc, and I'm always offering our expertise as his parents (I am also a secondary school teacher). 

I don't feel the teachers quite understand how important it is to identify the causes of the meltdowns, and I keep emphasing that 'prevention is better than cure'. 

Is there anyone else out there that has been through this frustrating problem? It's just so hard as a parent getting used to mainstream school and not being updated each day on your child's progress like nursery did. I have to ask if any meltdowns have occured, and when I'm told about them most of the time the teacher has took all other children out of the classroom due to health and safety risks - which I find very distressing.

I'm happy to discuss anything else further. Anyone else been in a similar situation or have any advice? I fear these meltdowns could be dealt with differently as they are disrupting the lessons and also isolating my son.

Many thanks.

Parents
  • Thank you both for your advice so far, and I will check out those links asap.

    Yes my son does have a statement of 20 hours. We finally recieved it a month or so before the 6 week holidays. Initially our son was given a school placement in a much larger mainstream school 400+ pupils in total (60 in the foundation unit he would be in). We thought this was far too large a school for him to cope with, and so was thankful of finally getting his statement and being able to push through and get into a much smaller village school, which offered a great 'open door' policy.

    We rushed in last minute transition meetings etc and believed they were quite happy with the arrangement. The only issue was they would have to get in another TA quite quick. 

    It seems at present his reception class has a variety of TA's visiting at different times, and I'm now considering asking them to have a main TA so they can become an expert on my son.

    I guess I'm just frustrated because we were supported so well pre-school (he attended a mainstream nursery and a special needs nursery). And even though I feel we have done a lot in preparing them for him, it's not the transition we were hoping for. It's scary to think that it's all down to the school now and the decisions they make.

    Only last week have we got his diagnosis report finalised, and so that's now being passed on to school in which I have asked them to use it to contact Autism Outreach and bring them in. I'm just frustrated that all this papework takes time - I want to contact Autism Outreach myself but I'm unsure what reassurance they can give me, and I guess it's not worth it until they get the paperwork? I'm not sure.

    But since September the only experts in my sons case are us the parents. I think they will get sick of us soon, but I know I have to push. A speech therapist is due in the beginning of October and I'm so thankful that it's the same person that's worked with him in the past - it's nice to have a familiar face.

Reply
  • Thank you both for your advice so far, and I will check out those links asap.

    Yes my son does have a statement of 20 hours. We finally recieved it a month or so before the 6 week holidays. Initially our son was given a school placement in a much larger mainstream school 400+ pupils in total (60 in the foundation unit he would be in). We thought this was far too large a school for him to cope with, and so was thankful of finally getting his statement and being able to push through and get into a much smaller village school, which offered a great 'open door' policy.

    We rushed in last minute transition meetings etc and believed they were quite happy with the arrangement. The only issue was they would have to get in another TA quite quick. 

    It seems at present his reception class has a variety of TA's visiting at different times, and I'm now considering asking them to have a main TA so they can become an expert on my son.

    I guess I'm just frustrated because we were supported so well pre-school (he attended a mainstream nursery and a special needs nursery). And even though I feel we have done a lot in preparing them for him, it's not the transition we were hoping for. It's scary to think that it's all down to the school now and the decisions they make.

    Only last week have we got his diagnosis report finalised, and so that's now being passed on to school in which I have asked them to use it to contact Autism Outreach and bring them in. I'm just frustrated that all this papework takes time - I want to contact Autism Outreach myself but I'm unsure what reassurance they can give me, and I guess it's not worth it until they get the paperwork? I'm not sure.

    But since September the only experts in my sons case are us the parents. I think they will get sick of us soon, but I know I have to push. A speech therapist is due in the beginning of October and I'm so thankful that it's the same person that's worked with him in the past - it's nice to have a familiar face.

Children
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