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Meltdown advice needed for my 4 year old son.

Arti

Hi everyone.

My 4 year old son is now starting his 4th week at his mainstream primary school, and he has just recieved a working diagnosis of autism. We are very proud of how he has handled this transition from nursery to primary, and each day he is happy to go to school.

Our main concern is the occurance of meltdowns in the classroom and how it is handled. These meltdowns are quite new to my husband and I - I guess because we automatically know what might upset our son and so we naturally avoid or distract him from them. A meltdown usually occurs because of suprises/ change in routine.

By all means we try very hard to liase with teacher/ teaching assistants, but we feel they are inexperienced in dealing with autism. We are all presently active in get outside services in etc, and I'm always offering our expertise as his parents (I am also a secondary school teacher). 

I don't feel the teachers quite understand how important it is to identify the causes of the meltdowns, and I keep emphasing that 'prevention is better than cure'. 

Is there anyone else out there that has been through this frustrating problem? It's just so hard as a parent getting used to mainstream school and not being updated each day on your child's progress like nursery did. I have to ask if any meltdowns have occured, and when I'm told about them most of the time the teacher has took all other children out of the classroom due to health and safety risks - which I find very distressing.

I'm happy to discuss anything else further. Anyone else been in a similar situation or have any advice? I fear these meltdowns could be dealt with differently as they are disrupting the lessons and also isolating my son.

Many thanks.

Parents

  • Hi - you are absolutely right to be getting "outside services" involved - who exactly have you approached.  Also has your son got a statement of educational needs which could provide him with a teaching assistant whom I'm sure you would make certain was very well trained in autism.  My son always went to autism-specific schools so these issues didn't arise but did later when he left school + was with staff who weren't trained in autism + how it affected him as a person.  Some people are very well intentioned but don't get it, some people just carry on going their own sweet way - it doesn't sink in for various reasons.  You can talk + talk + talk + find that little changes.  It's a hard time when that happens + causes anxiety all round for the child/parents.  It sounds like the school are failing your son + yourselves.  That's why he's reacting the way he is.

Reply

  • Hi - you are absolutely right to be getting "outside services" involved - who exactly have you approached.  Also has your son got a statement of educational needs which could provide him with a teaching assistant whom I'm sure you would make certain was very well trained in autism.  My son always went to autism-specific schools so these issues didn't arise but did later when he left school + was with staff who weren't trained in autism + how it affected him as a person.  Some people are very well intentioned but don't get it, some people just carry on going their own sweet way - it doesn't sink in for various reasons.  You can talk + talk + talk + find that little changes.  It's a hard time when that happens + causes anxiety all round for the child/parents.  It sounds like the school are failing your son + yourselves.  That's why he's reacting the way he is.

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