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Hating the sound of your own voice - will you join me?

LostGUY

So, I've got to admit the recent thread about hating the sound of your own voice really touched a nerve with me. The sound of my voice when played back to me is something that has made me cringe since childhood, a good 40+ years ago. When I hear it back I don't just feel it sounds different, in my mind I think it sounds horrendously bad and I would say I've avoided talking because of this thought many times. So, after reading the near universal comments on here that everyone seems to hate the sound of their voice when played back, it got me thinking....maybe my thought is wrong, maybe my voice is not bad after all...maybe I just need to get used to hearing it played back, some kind of exposure therapy. So my plan is to record myself talking every day for say, 7 days, and see if my reaction to my voice becomes more bearable the more I hear it. I know this sounds terrible, but this is my invite to all who hate their voice, join me in this experiment, and post your thoughts. any takers? If not, I may just post my own results back here anyway. 

  • in reply to NAS85446

    It's great you have reached that point in life about not caring what others think. I feel I'm starting to get towards that point after many years of worrying about saying or doing the wrong thing. I think my recent diagnosis has made me look through a new lens at my life (I know this is a bit of a cliche) but I'm definitely seeing things differently since finding out I'm Autistic. Hopefully my new autistic identity will continue to grow and I will leave behind the old ways of trying to fit in and make sense of the NT world. 

  • I have the same experience, but to be honest I reached the age of forty myself 17 years ago and my whole attitude toward caring what anyone else thought of me changed and I became myself. Like me or loathe me, I don't care. I treat people with respect and do my best each day, I sing if I feel like it and I still don't like my own voice, but it's mine and it's me!

  • in reply to Shardovan

    Thanks for the reply shardovan, yes I must admit that the thing you said about being aware making it difficult to recreate natural conversation, has crossed my mind. I liked what you said about the other participant clearly caring less about your voice than you. I think that's a great point, we are so much harder on ourselves sometimes than we are to others. Perhaps this issue is highlighting this about myself. 

    So, back to my experiment... I'm now thinking, what a ridiculous idea, I can't possibly do that, what on earth was I thinking?  Then again, I do really want to get past the thoughts I'm having, so will maybe have to be brave... Voice recorder it is then. I will report back here as it progresses, for anyone that may.. or may not be interested. Smile

  • I must admit that I’ve tried that in the past. Used voice recorder on my phone. The problem is that it’s hard to fake naturalistic conversation with yourself so it becomes an uncanny valley. But it may still help with radical acceptance, I’ve had fleeting moments of that. I do have access now to about four online conversations between me and someone else where because it’s a back and forth with no chance to overthink what I’m saying, it gives me the truest experience of how I sound. Bloody awful but clearly forgiven for it by the other participant, who seems to care less about the unavoidable medium (my dreadful vocal chords and accent) than the message: my thoughts in the form of a review.