My son hates school and it’s affecting his mental health

If your son has a diagnosis of autism, the school are obliged to make accommodations so that his autism does not handicap him relative to his non-autistic peers. You could consider a specialist school as an alternative.

Both myself and my daughter were diagnosed after finishing school (me, many decades later), and while we both hated school we both feel that it toughened us up to face later challenges, I started school being selectively mute, but finished education with a PhD.

We are still waiting for an assessment but it’s taking so long. He need a ehcp but be easier to get one when he has being assessed. I do want him to continue going to school, just wish they were more adapted for his needs. 

We got an EHCP for my son before he was diagnosed, although did have to go through tribunal. It is worth starting on it and keeping notes so you have plenty of evidence.

My son also hates it when they stop them playing football as he doesn't know what to do. I hope for his sake they come up with something. 

I also wish you well with the EHCP. 

He is in year 5 so hopefully get one sorted before high school. 

It’s nice to hear that someone gets it. He already has calm time on a morning either choosing a friend to play football with or in an office. He’s had a visual time table, zones of regulation, and use of laptop, check ins. He always says that it’s too noisy and he can’t concentrate on his work, that’s why he wants to be home schooled. The teachers have offered him ear defenders but he still says they don’t work. He loves football, that’s his passion but now the school have stopped football at lunch times for the past 3 weeks because of the children misbehaving. So he is really not happy about it. Says what is he going to do now at lunch times. To be honest I don’t think they know. I’ve just got to be patient with him but it’s hard when you feel helpless 

My son also had a suspension for reacting to something done to him, so I understand the frustration for a child who finds it difficult to get into school. 

Are you able to speak to the SENCO to discuss some adjustments to help him get back?

Having an EHCP in Secondary School has been important as we have regular contact with SENCO. Not sure if he goes up this year or next, but worth aiming for EHCP by Secondary if possible and it gives more choice of school when he goes up.

My son also had a suspension for reacting to something done to him, so I understand the frustration for a child who finds it difficult to get into school. 

Are you able to speak to the SENCO to discuss some adjustments to help him get back?

Having an EHCP in Secondary School has been important as we have regular contact with SENCO. Not sure if he goes up this year or next, but worth aiming for EHCP by Secondary if possible and it gives more choice of school when he goes up.

My son also hates it when they stop them playing football as he doesn't know what to do. I hope for his sake they come up with something. 

I also wish you well with the EHCP. 

He is in year 5 so hopefully get one sorted before high school.