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Excessive need to talk things through - advice?

NAS84381

Hi I was wondering if anyone has any advice on how to handle a situation. 

An autistic person I know needs to talk things through excessively when things go wrong in their life and I am the person who primarily looks out for them. 

This can be things related to work or family.

Often this can be talking for multiple hours (sometimes 6 hours +) and the topic will discussed over and over. I myself have a lifelong illness which is progressively getting worse. 

The need to talk for hours is exceptionally draining to the point where it impacts my health. 

I can't try to stop the talking as then the person will get agitated and it will most of the time lead to a violent meltdown as they feel they are not being heard.

This will be despite listening for hours at a time and trying to give input to what is troubling them. 

I want to help this person and I want to listen to their troubles however it is starting to have a big impact on me. 

Does anyone have any advice on how to make this better while still giving the listening support that's clearly needed by the autistic person in my life?

Thank you

Parents

  • I can understand the need to talk things through. I do this too although not for hours. I will run things through in my head first before sharing something which I then go on about if it is not getting resolved, often looking at it from different angles.

    Sometimes I will write things down. I wonder if this is something they can do or perhaps send an email, but explain that you will take a while to reply. The reply could be short confirming receipt or that you understand they are having difficulty.

    Also regarding work, depending on the type of work, some companies have organisations employees can call confidentiality to talk through problems.

  • in reply to Homebird

    Hi Homebird, 

    Thank you so much for your comment. 

    The writing things down sounds like an option. I often find writing down worries means I feel like it's I've done something!

    Thank you again for replying. 

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