Supporting my 13 yo son with growing up

Hi I'd love some advice from some parents of teens with autism but also any teens with autism would be fab to hear your opinion too! 

I have a 13 year old son with autism. He has started asked about being allowed to chat to friends on on-line services and asked for a phone for his birthday. He's a good lad, but is easily influenced by others. He also takes others words to heart. He has been bullied so much at school and I'm worried about him being bullied online too. In my opinion, 13 is too young for a phone unless you need it for going out or travelling to or from school (he gets picked up by mini bus), but that's just me! 

Can I get some opinions/advice. Am I being too "strict" or harsh on him? Raising a teen with autism is hard! 

Parents
  • Hiya!

    I’m an autistic teen, I understand your concerns. I like to write on online forums to develop my social skills.

    I really didn’t want a phone but then my mum bought me one without me knowing when I was 16. Joy she bought it for me to help communicate when I was out. I don’t use it much a part from when I am out.

    Perhaps, if you got him a phone you could monitor what he does on it closely, just like setting some ground rules, like social media.

    I think it is important he feels trusted and not being too intrusive so he can come to you with any worries.

    I don’t think 13 is too young because many of his peers will probably have phone and perhaps it will help him to feel more connected.

    I think you should think about the reasons you wouldn’t get him a phone, don’t treat him differently form any NT kid, if your reasons outweigh the pros for a phone then sit him down and explain why you have decided this.

    Also ask him why he wants a phone and discuss any ground rules you would like to set.

    I hope this helps!

    Good luck.

Reply
  • Hiya!

    I’m an autistic teen, I understand your concerns. I like to write on online forums to develop my social skills.

    I really didn’t want a phone but then my mum bought me one without me knowing when I was 16. Joy she bought it for me to help communicate when I was out. I don’t use it much a part from when I am out.

    Perhaps, if you got him a phone you could monitor what he does on it closely, just like setting some ground rules, like social media.

    I think it is important he feels trusted and not being too intrusive so he can come to you with any worries.

    I don’t think 13 is too young because many of his peers will probably have phone and perhaps it will help him to feel more connected.

    I think you should think about the reasons you wouldn’t get him a phone, don’t treat him differently form any NT kid, if your reasons outweigh the pros for a phone then sit him down and explain why you have decided this.

    Also ask him why he wants a phone and discuss any ground rules you would like to set.

    I hope this helps!

    Good luck.

Children
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