• Replies 8 replies
  • Subscribers 70 subscribers
  • Views 1407 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Supporting my 13 yo son with growing up

Amy S

Hi I'd love some advice from some parents of teens with autism but also any teens with autism would be fab to hear your opinion too! 

I have a 13 year old son with autism. He has started asked about being allowed to chat to friends on on-line services and asked for a phone for his birthday. He's a good lad, but is easily influenced by others. He also takes others words to heart. He has been bullied so much at school and I'm worried about him being bullied online too. In my opinion, 13 is too young for a phone unless you need it for going out or travelling to or from school (he gets picked up by mini bus), but that's just me! 

Can I get some opinions/advice. Am I being too "strict" or harsh on him? Raising a teen with autism is hard! 

Parents

  • I'd give him the phone, precisely because now is the time he needs to get comfortable with 'going out,' traveling with out you, seeing friends when you're not near. The phone / social media will help with that. He's a teenager he's going to get bullied. The only way to avoid that is wrap him in cotton wool and keep him locked in a tower. The question is not can you stop him being bullied but if it happens can you find out about and intervene quickly.

    I suggest ground rules. Maybe he has to add you as a contact on any social media service so you can see anything publicly posted on his profile. Or maybe just an agreement that if anyone bullies him online he has to tell you. other wise you'll take the phone away.

    You may want to be careful of the settings on the phone so he can't make lots of in app purchases with your card or rack up huge phone bills on a phone contract.

  • in reply to Peter

    teenageres don't orgonise their social lives like play dates. They won't give him a day or twos notice so you can clear time in your diary to give him a lift to / from his friends house or the local cafe / skate part etc. He needs to be able to get a message and in a few hours notice hop on a bus. He'll need a phone  to develop that confidence and social media to get those sorts of invitations.

  • in reply to Peter

    Interesting comment, we have discovered that. The difficulty with my autistic son is he doesn't always know all the details, so takes a while to organize. It is helpful if he meets friends as will message about the time he is returning or if he will be late. 

Reply Children
No Data