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Non autistic child self harming in a household with an autistic sibling

__Pathfinder__

Not an easy subject, but I am looking for info and resources on this.  My nephew was recently diagnosed with autism, he is less functional than I am and really hard work with almost daily meltdowns.  The problem is his behaviour over the years, along with a lot of other factors has had a massive effect on his non-autistic sister who is now struggling with her mental health.  She has reached the self harm point and has tried to kill herself a couple of times, but she doesn't appear to be serious about it.  She is already under a local mental health team.  She has told me she hates her brother and wishes her family was normal.  Our entire family is worried about her.

While the core problems aren't just related to her brothers autism, it does play a large part in it.  Has anyone got any strategies for helping her.  So far i have tried to be there for her as her uncle, but I feel at times like I am fighting a losing battle.  It seems like she just continues to deterioate.  My family are considering letting her live away from home for a while to try and get a firebreak away from her brother, although it would only be a temporary measure.

Their are other factors involved in her problems too, including lack of friends and bullying.  Attempts have been made to rectify the friends issue, but bullying seems to be one of those almost impossible things to deal with.  She has told me that her brother is an embarrassment to her and her friends couldn't cope with his continuous behavioural issues.

Has anyone got any ideas, links to resources, etc?  Anything I can read and try to apply to the situation to help her would be good.

Thanks.

Parents

  • It’s not unusual for the other siblings to react in this way. It’s all about attention. They aren’t getting enough, and seek to find it in other ways. I also think there might be more going on with her.

    There are lots of places she can talk or text to a counsellor or similar. I know of the service Kooth that seems popular.I can’t think of any others off the top of my head right now, and of course some will be dependent on age. 
    Do the mental health have any inkling on what she could be suffering with or why? I don’t feel like they take this situation as seriously as they should. It’s almost as if all teens do this sort of thing, and it’s normal. Well, I’m afraid it isn’t, and it needs nipping in the bud sooner rather than later.

    Hopefully a MOd can send some helpful links for you.

Reply

  • It’s not unusual for the other siblings to react in this way. It’s all about attention. They aren’t getting enough, and seek to find it in other ways. I also think there might be more going on with her.

    There are lots of places she can talk or text to a counsellor or similar. I know of the service Kooth that seems popular.I can’t think of any others off the top of my head right now, and of course some will be dependent on age. 
    Do the mental health have any inkling on what she could be suffering with or why? I don’t feel like they take this situation as seriously as they should. It’s almost as if all teens do this sort of thing, and it’s normal. Well, I’m afraid it isn’t, and it needs nipping in the bud sooner rather than later.

    Hopefully a MOd can send some helpful links for you.

Children