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Violent teenager

NAS77961

I am alone with my son who is 14 and now near enough the same size as me. His violent outbursts are becoming more difficult to deal with. He rips out my hair and pins me to the floor, biting or bashing my head when I struggle.

Today he pulled me down the side of the bed and we fell in an awkward position where I was wedged, unable to move, with my arm crushing his neck, which obviously was terrifying for us both and could have ended very badly. Luckily I managed to move enough to free him but not myself and he then pinned me down for over an hour.

I just don't know how to stop this behaviour, how to get help or what I should do or how to react. The advice I have received over the years has been pitiful and useless and stinks of box-ticking.

We technically have a disability team social worker but they are virtually useless. I've met them twice in a year and they have nothing to offer except to tell me to call police. Is that seriously the only "help" there is? What exactly is the purpose of a social worker if all they do is tell you to call police? Is there something else they can do that they aren't revealing?

I believe calling the police would make things much worse but I don't even have the option when I'm pinned to the floor without my phone. 

Parents

  • Wow - this sounds really hard. Do you know what is setting him off? Assuming he's not being overwhelmed by his senses (lights, sounds, materials, scents, etc.), are there any psychological things he's reacting to? Could he be in need of anti-anxiety drugs for an occasional episode or could there be another "imbalance" neurologically. My brother and my son had various anti-depressants to get through high school. They helped a little, but had I better support when my son was in high school I would've pulled him out of school and found somewhere else more suitable. Eventually we found Ashwaganda and a multi helped regulate his emotions.

    Does your son have additional needs? Are you able to contact his father? Most mothers should not be taking on their teenage males alone. 

Reply

  • Wow - this sounds really hard. Do you know what is setting him off? Assuming he's not being overwhelmed by his senses (lights, sounds, materials, scents, etc.), are there any psychological things he's reacting to? Could he be in need of anti-anxiety drugs for an occasional episode or could there be another "imbalance" neurologically. My brother and my son had various anti-depressants to get through high school. They helped a little, but had I better support when my son was in high school I would've pulled him out of school and found somewhere else more suitable. Eventually we found Ashwaganda and a multi helped regulate his emotions.

    Does your son have additional needs? Are you able to contact his father? Most mothers should not be taking on their teenage males alone. 

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