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Worried parent

Momma moomin

Hey there.

I'm a mom to an awesome 19 year old with asd amongst other things. I'm worried for her being forced onto courses or placements after she leaves college. She has huge struggles socially and environmentally every single day. She masks her autism, but if pushed to much she lashes out and the agression and destructive behaviour appears, or she saves it until she comes home, and has meltdowns.

In her words I will be ok so long as I don't have to deal with people. 

Unfortunately everywhere has people, no offence to anyone about her statement. She doesn't quite retain inform o to doesn't process it properly and gets distracted etc, something like a smell,sound,texture,person can instantly set her off. 

I guess I'm just wondering if there's anyone in the same predicament or if they have been through it and their outcomes.

Thanks Thumbsup

Parents

  • Oh! I empathise with this, she sounds like me when I was that age but I didn't have a wonderful mum like you!! There are so many areas of work she could go into which might be less overwhelming. In media, TV editing and Radio can be good for individuals who don't mind a whole day by themselves. Working in gardens or with plants can be good. Research (if she's not bothered about lighting in labs) can be solo work. She could learn to build and craft jewellery, lamps, pottery, clothing... Etsy is full of independent crafters. She could code and work in IT or repair. I know so many people who work for themselves. If she has a little business admin knowledge (this is the hardest thing for me, but it must get done) and has a few years of uninterrupted time focusing on a craft that she finds she connects with, it could be a good start. 

    I work in sound & music, and there are jobs here like sound design and foley which she could look into as well. I will say it's Art (Creators, not performers), Science and Engineering where we seem to have these more independent roles. 

    Managing a sensory environment is key. But I'm really not happy with what is being legally allowed. Chemically made scents which off-gas VOCs and formaldehyde are everywhere - in stores, in furniture, in insulation. Noise levels of sirens and alarms and theatres are at levels and frequencies which are deafening. Lights are damaging to retinas, with too much UV. I rarely find fruit which isn't laced with petroleum based wax... there are far too many things in society which are aggressively harmful and not human-friendly. Being young, she won't have learned to separate an aggression against the senses vs something lacking in aesthetic. Learning to identify these can also be valuable to her as she gets older. 

  • in reply to JuniperFromGallifrey

    In Northern Ireland; most IT Firms are team-oriented. So there mightn't be room for being on your own. On reflection, I was pushed into IT by my Teachers. Just because I had an interest in Computers. Such is life.

    I wanted to be a Radio DJ as a kid. Around thirteen, I began getting into Indie Music. Though there are gaps in my knowledge, I still enjoy new music. 

  • in reply to Desmond79

    Hey Desmond Blush

    Thank you for the heads up regards of the IT scene, do you enjoy your job? And does it suit your needs?.

    Love indie music! My daughter loves music, it's one of her comforts, has been since a baby also car rides too. Even to this day we still have to take her for a drive and on go her earphones.

    I hope you do decide to set up a podcast that would be amazing! I'd deffo tune in too! 

    What topics would you cover?..

Reply
  • in reply to Desmond79

    Hey Desmond Blush

    Thank you for the heads up regards of the IT scene, do you enjoy your job? And does it suit your needs?.

    Love indie music! My daughter loves music, it's one of her comforts, has been since a baby also car rides too. Even to this day we still have to take her for a drive and on go her earphones.

    I hope you do decide to set up a podcast that would be amazing! I'd deffo tune in too! 

    What topics would you cover?..

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