• Replies 3 replies
  • Subscribers 67 subscribers
  • Views 909 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Need help for my sister

BigSister

Hi I need help and advice for my little sister. She has Autism and is in a bad way and not coping with every day life. My dad has got in touch with the gp and we're on a waiting list to see a specialist but it's been months and still nothing. My sister seems to be getting worse so I'm hoping someone here can help us.

Here's the problems she is facing. She won't eat anything but toast for lunch and tea. She's thin and pale. A dietician is meant to be getting in touch but so far we've heard nothing. Sometimes she won't drink anything, and I mean she literally stops drinking which results in dehydration and then she has to go to hospital for fluids, this happens frequently. Our mum passed away earlier in the year but before that my sister was mostly ok she used to talk to our mum all the time but now she doesn't talk at all. Is this normal for someone with Autism when grieving? She also has tantrums where she explodes for no reason. She'll cry and scream, throws things and we don't know what to do or say. Nothing calms her down. We know nothing about Autism she was diagnosed last year but after the diagnosis we weren't offered any help or support. If anyone has experience of this please help. Thanks x

Parents

  • I'm sorry to hear your struggling with your little sister. It must be very hard. How old is she? Why does she stop drinking? My daughter doesn't drink throughout the day because she just forgets so we remind her and we have one of the bottles with times of the day on so she has to drink so much every hour. I'm sorry to hear about your mum, I'm here if you need to talk, we all are. Everyone grieves differently and by the sounds of it, this is normal. If she used to talk to your mum and now she's not here, she can't talk to her. She's most likely missing her. What did they talk about? Can you or your dad talk to her about what they used to talk about together? Did she talk to you both before? Are her tantrums new or has she had them before things happened? She's probably still grieving. My daughter lost her best friend last year and she would explode months later, and nothing would calm her. From my personal experience with my daughter, we found out that she didn't understand what happened to her friend, and she didn't accept that she was gone, then months later, it all hit her and she would just explode, what we thought was no reason. That was her best friend but when it's your own family member, you are all devastated. Does she understand death, and what happened. It's an upsetting topic and some people just don't believe and won't believe that such a thing can happen.

    My number one advice when she explodes is much sure everyone's safe. Can you stand back and give her space when this happens? Can you play a favourite song or TV channel in the background that can distract her. This sometimes works but it can fuel things more and overload her and make the situation worse, keep that in mind. Did she explode before or just after? If she did before, what calmed her down. Sometime a weighted blanket can calm someone with autism down, or a hug, deep pressure, from my experience, everyone is different. When it does happen, talk to her in simple sentences and reassure her but don't talk touch and overwhelm her even more. Can you keep a journal of her behavior and when she explodes, and write down, who was there, what you were doing before hand, the time it started and ended, what happened during that time, where it was, what was in the background for example microwave, TV, radio, and maybe there is a pattern of behavior even though you might not realise it now. Do your best to take care of her and yourself, I know it's hard but things will get better, just give it time, I promise. Do your best for her. I don't know if this is any help, but I wish you luck for the future. Don't forget I've here if you need to rant or talk. Xx

Reply

  • I'm sorry to hear your struggling with your little sister. It must be very hard. How old is she? Why does she stop drinking? My daughter doesn't drink throughout the day because she just forgets so we remind her and we have one of the bottles with times of the day on so she has to drink so much every hour. I'm sorry to hear about your mum, I'm here if you need to talk, we all are. Everyone grieves differently and by the sounds of it, this is normal. If she used to talk to your mum and now she's not here, she can't talk to her. She's most likely missing her. What did they talk about? Can you or your dad talk to her about what they used to talk about together? Did she talk to you both before? Are her tantrums new or has she had them before things happened? She's probably still grieving. My daughter lost her best friend last year and she would explode months later, and nothing would calm her. From my personal experience with my daughter, we found out that she didn't understand what happened to her friend, and she didn't accept that she was gone, then months later, it all hit her and she would just explode, what we thought was no reason. That was her best friend but when it's your own family member, you are all devastated. Does she understand death, and what happened. It's an upsetting topic and some people just don't believe and won't believe that such a thing can happen.

    My number one advice when she explodes is much sure everyone's safe. Can you stand back and give her space when this happens? Can you play a favourite song or TV channel in the background that can distract her. This sometimes works but it can fuel things more and overload her and make the situation worse, keep that in mind. Did she explode before or just after? If she did before, what calmed her down. Sometime a weighted blanket can calm someone with autism down, or a hug, deep pressure, from my experience, everyone is different. When it does happen, talk to her in simple sentences and reassure her but don't talk touch and overwhelm her even more. Can you keep a journal of her behavior and when she explodes, and write down, who was there, what you were doing before hand, the time it started and ended, what happened during that time, where it was, what was in the background for example microwave, TV, radio, and maybe there is a pattern of behavior even though you might not realise it now. Do your best to take care of her and yourself, I know it's hard but things will get better, just give it time, I promise. Do your best for her. I don't know if this is any help, but I wish you luck for the future. Don't forget I've here if you need to rant or talk. Xx

Children
No Data