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Why is losing a game a big deal?

Nana

Hello,

My question today is why losing a game is a very big deal for my son.

It does upset him so much when that happens that he will cry no stop until he feels calm again. I understand it is difficult for him to give words to his emotions and it is heart breaking to witnesses his frustration. Telling him that it is a game and sometimes you lose doesn't help.

What should I do?

Thank you

Parents

  • It is something I have always had and still have. The upset and rage is a form of autistic meltdown and is usually self-directed. Autistics are not good at self-regulation and situations that are merely disappointing or vexing for allistic people can overwhelm our ability to cope. My solution was and is not to play board games or card games. People eventually understand that I just don't play that sort of competitive game and I'm quite happy to sit on the sidelines. As a child, I always preferred imaginative play, drawing and painting, construction kits and suchlike. 

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  • It is something I have always had and still have. The upset and rage is a form of autistic meltdown and is usually self-directed. Autistics are not good at self-regulation and situations that are merely disappointing or vexing for allistic people can overwhelm our ability to cope. My solution was and is not to play board games or card games. People eventually understand that I just don't play that sort of competitive game and I'm quite happy to sit on the sidelines. As a child, I always preferred imaginative play, drawing and painting, construction kits and suchlike. 

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