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Nana

Hello everybody,

I believe I am in need of some wisdom again. My boy who is nearly 7 is autistic and attends mainstream education. School is being quite supportive in general although there have been a few episodes that have left me and my husband wondering. Some of the TAs who occasionally work with him can be rude and I suspect that has to do with me pointing out that they were not treating him fairly at the beginning of the school year. (He would be punished for not paying attention to the TA during a reading session despite a report saying he had attention and listening Issues. That was causing him a lot of anxiety. At the time he was not diagnosed yet. Most recently, they have used the rainbow system to try and deal with his problematic behaviour again although they have been asked not to. The system provokes anxiety especially with autistic children.) I just find myself in the middle of something I struggle to understand. Shouldn't the people in school be the ones who know better? He was so upset this morning because he would like to be spoken to with respect, the same one they should be modelling in school. I am afraid they believe my son is unaware of what goes on because he seems not to be listening. And yet, he is one of the lucky ones because he does not have enormous sensory challenges and he is able to survive the school day.

I know that if I feel wronged and especially because this involves my child I try and be honest about things I do not agree with and I thought I was being polite. But maybe they have taken it personally or just do not understand the impact their actions can have on these children. Or maybe it's just me, the overprotective me who cannot stand to be wronged.

  • in reply to Anna Mod

    Thank you Anna Mod. To be fair it is not the entire school but just a couple of people who I wish could change their attitude. But thank you for your suggestion, greatly appreciated. Blush

  • in reply to Daniel

    Hello Daniel, thank you for your explanation.

    It is the lack of understanding from some people who work in close contact with SEN children that I find concerning. What a difference it would make if those people were passionate about their jobs, about making a difference to those children's lives. But maybe I am naive and expect too much.

  • in reply to Caelus

    Hi Caelus, thank you for your reply. Yes, I agree with you when you say that a good teacher makes a good student. It is unfortunate that schools are so squeezed and lack in proper funding to support everybody. I am not only thinking of the pupils but the support staff as well. I do not think they have the right training to deal with it.  Thank you very much, Caelus. I hope your sister's child is doing well. 

  • Dear , I'm sorry to hear that the way school is treating your son is making him upset. The following page contains a lot of helpful information about education for a child with an autism: https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/education. This includes information regarding getting extra support for your child in their education setting. 

    You may want to contact our Education Rights Service who provides information, support and advice on educational provision and entitlements. Please see the following link for further information: https://www.autism.org.uk/what-we-do/help-and-support/education-advice-line.

    I hope this helps.

    Best wishes,

    Anna Mod

  • Nana,

    I experienced something like this in mainstream secondary school, for some reason schools still seem to have a great lack of knowledge concerning autism.

    Those of us on The Autism Spectrum are more sensitive to the stimulus around us, that's why some become so overstimulated, we are conscious of the things others are unconscious of. Brains have a filter that releases all irrelevant information the brain senses, autistic brains lack this filter so the irrelevant information doesn't filter out. This eventually leads to information overload, the time they can't process anymore information.

    By our attention being on the entire environment anchored to the stimulus it's not easy to select which information to pay attention to. The autistic mind attends the details more than neurotypical minds giving us more information to process. 

    Research shows that there's additional activity on an autistic brain's amygdala, the amygdala is where the "fight or flight" hormone is activated, if their system is new to him or if he doesn't understand it he will receive more anxiety with the heightened activity in the amygdala.

    If the TAs are not doing so, tell them to be specific, avoid unverbal communication, speak step by step and ask him for his attention by name if something distracts him.

  • my sisters kid, she says that teachers complain he doesnt listen and so on too.

    i pointed out this is likely not the kids fault... this is the teachers fault. if the teacher is boring then how can the teacher expect to attract the students attention? there is no learning difficulties, there is only teaching difficulties. there is no bad student, only a bad teacher. alot of these claims of kids having learning difficulties is just shoddy teachers passing the blame onto the kids when the fault is their fault for being uninteresting.

    the system is and always will be rubbish. i dont think it can be fixed until they acknowledge their own failings and see them. which is never, as they will keep passing the blame to the kids all the time when the fault is the teachers own for being boring.