ASD Unit in mainstream school or Special school

Hello All,
First of all thanks to anyone who takes the time to read this. I have a little boy who is about to turn 3 and was recently diagnosed as being autistic. He has been attending nursery sessions at a brilliant special school since late last year. At his review they indicated that long term the school he is at (which we love) would not be a suitable option for him and he will likely change schools in a year. I asked what they thought might be suitable and they said a mainstream school with an ASD unit attached. I suggested perhaps a school that is solely for ASD pupils but they didn't seem to think so although they didn't say why & I will be asking after half term. They are starting his statementing process and are confident that will go through fine. 

So here's my dilemma. I am extremely concerned about sending my boy to a school that is predominantly mainstream. My main worry is that he will be bullied or teased and won't even realise or be able to tell anyone. He has no comprehension of others emotions at all and just thinks everyone wants to play with him. As he gets older the difference between him and other 'normal' children becomes more pronounced. His peer group now comment on his lack of speech (he only has limited single words) and not always in a very nice way. He is also a master copycat and because he wants to play with anybody around but doesn't really understand how that normally works he mimics other children. This can be irritating to them and has led to some unpleasant experiences where i have had to remove him when the children get annoyed with him. He also likes to be affectionate and hug other children but frequently tries to do this to children who are not actually being nice to him. I know it sounds small but he is very long sighted and has to wear glasses with very magnifying lenses which sets him apart from most other children and can make him a target for mean kids. I really don't know what his best options are and I didn't think he would have to change schools so soon. The school he is at now is so lovely and he thrives there but I guess they will need the space perhaps for a more disabled child. All of this is causing me a lot of anxiety. I can't raise it with his teacher until after half term so I was wanting to hear the experiences of others.

The nearest ASD school is about half an hour from me and is very good. There are also two small ASD units attached to mainstream primary schools near me. One is at a very bad school and the other is at a good school but they only take children up to age 7 anyway. I really want to hear any experiences, good or bad,or advice about my options. In the end will I even have a choice or if his teachers think ASD unit in mainstream is best is that what we have to accept?

Thanks

Parents
  • Thanks for the advice and for sharing your experience. The truth is i'm so confused by everything that was said at his review that I just feel in total limbo. Having to wait a week before I can speak to his teacher is not helping. The review was the day before half term and my partner was away so couldn't come with me. The exact phrase that was used was 'long term he's not for us'. That may have been a poor choice of words but it's left me feeling almost like they can't wait to get rid of him. They seemed to try and soften it by saying 'he's too good'. Lovely though that is he's still autistic and his verbal abilities are below a one year olds! He has been so happy and accepted at that school because it is a special school (hate that word too BTW!). There is no bullying and the children and teachers are so wonderful. Just hate feeling like now we are on borrowed time. Logically I know that he can't stay there forever and maybe we have to let him move towards mainstream but it seems too soon. I'm rambling sorry. I really do appreciate everyone's advice and would specially like to hear from people who do have a child in an ASD unit within a mainstream school. Any experiences good or bad would be very gratefully received. Thanks all

Reply
  • Thanks for the advice and for sharing your experience. The truth is i'm so confused by everything that was said at his review that I just feel in total limbo. Having to wait a week before I can speak to his teacher is not helping. The review was the day before half term and my partner was away so couldn't come with me. The exact phrase that was used was 'long term he's not for us'. That may have been a poor choice of words but it's left me feeling almost like they can't wait to get rid of him. They seemed to try and soften it by saying 'he's too good'. Lovely though that is he's still autistic and his verbal abilities are below a one year olds! He has been so happy and accepted at that school because it is a special school (hate that word too BTW!). There is no bullying and the children and teachers are so wonderful. Just hate feeling like now we are on borrowed time. Logically I know that he can't stay there forever and maybe we have to let him move towards mainstream but it seems too soon. I'm rambling sorry. I really do appreciate everyone's advice and would specially like to hear from people who do have a child in an ASD unit within a mainstream school. Any experiences good or bad would be very gratefully received. Thanks all

Children
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