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Working

Annah

Hello,

My daughter is 7 and yet to be formally diagnosed, we're due an appointment this month but we'll see!

Amongst other things she has quite bad separation anxiety and hates it when I go to work, in an ideal world she would like me to drop her at school, sit at home waiting for her and then be with her! So when I go to work then she'll punish me and I'll get growled at, bitten, hit, pushed, pinched etc.

I work shifts and recently I have had a wibble moment and am trying to get a better work/life balance, or rather I should say a better work/child balance!!

Just wondering if many of you have similar problems and how your work have been about it? My request has been met with "well she'll get used to it" and "you need to sort it, we'd all like to be there for our children" and the fact that she's soooo demanding seems to go over their heads! Or do I just expect to much???

Thanks :)

Parents

  • hi - I don't think there is near enough awareness within the general population about autism.  You can always tell because when you explain something to someone they come out with comments such as the ones you've mentioned above.  You presume they'll understand, but they don't.   It cd be that because you work shifts her routine is disrupted.  Is she able to follow a timetable, either pictoral, written or both?  You cd put it up on a wall so she'd know what to expect in advance so it wdn't be a surprise.  On the other hand, unfortunately, she might get equally upset with the timetable/rota.  I don't know if your employer cd do something with your shifts which wd enable you to be there each day to take her + pick her up from school.  I think there may be legislation which says employers have to take caring responsibilities into account, but check the detail out via this site or another carer's site.  If you have a trade union at work it cd be worth joining.  Who takes her + picks her up when you're at work - is it the same person?  Just thinking it's a routine thing that's causing distress all round.  Hope she gets the diagnosis soon....that'll give you more support all round, hopefully.

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  • hi - I don't think there is near enough awareness within the general population about autism.  You can always tell because when you explain something to someone they come out with comments such as the ones you've mentioned above.  You presume they'll understand, but they don't.   It cd be that because you work shifts her routine is disrupted.  Is she able to follow a timetable, either pictoral, written or both?  You cd put it up on a wall so she'd know what to expect in advance so it wdn't be a surprise.  On the other hand, unfortunately, she might get equally upset with the timetable/rota.  I don't know if your employer cd do something with your shifts which wd enable you to be there each day to take her + pick her up from school.  I think there may be legislation which says employers have to take caring responsibilities into account, but check the detail out via this site or another carer's site.  If you have a trade union at work it cd be worth joining.  Who takes her + picks her up when you're at work - is it the same person?  Just thinking it's a routine thing that's causing distress all round.  Hope she gets the diagnosis soon....that'll give you more support all round, hopefully.

Children
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