Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi everyone. My 7 year old son was diagnosed with level 1 Autism. I had a feeling, but he still has some things that I consider normal, if not less likely to have Aspergers in the emotion department, if that makes any sense at all. As far as kids his own age goes, he cannot hold a conversation especially if its not a preferred topic. He can express excitment and anger, ( very well) but he also expresses like, sadness if he thinks he's in trouble by an adult. He could care less if a kid likes him, or even teases him, but god forbid an adult tells him to stop doing something he almost cries and starts stimming. Usually chews on something, or rocks (if hes able to sit down in the situation). I don't mean any offense by this at all, but this is new to me, and I feel like not much was explained. I was under the impression (again NO offense at all) that kids with Aspergers don't show much emotion? Especially with something like, shame I guess? He's obsessed with rules, and hates to see them broken by anyone, so maybe that has something to do with it? My best example is he's in Jiu Jitsu, and does fairly well despite his general awkwardness. But at times he gets overwhelmed by everything and he doesn't listen to some rules, and today he got confused and the coach told him to "please listen to the rules" and that's when he looked like he was going to cry and started stimming.
I feel like I may be comparing him too much to other kids, and his cousin who is the same age but is severely autistic. I'm just still wrapping my head around him finally being diagnosed I guess.
Thank you for anyone who listened to my rant here :)
I can understand that the assessment has probably come as a shock and all your expectations have been turned upside down. The NAS website has some very good information on autism and the different presentations, abilities and difficulties commonly experienced. Autism is a generic term for a neuro-type that is commonly characterised by difficulties with social interaction, repetitive and restricted interests and behaviours and often sensory processing difficulties. How these present is unique to each individual. I am autistic... I have emotions, I have empathy, I have a great deal of love and compassion for all living things, I have a sense of humour, I have a job and I am in a long term relationship. Like your son if I think I have done something wrong I feel intense shame and guilt, most of the time I will not understand what it is that I have done wrong which makes this even worse as I don't know how to put it right.
Be careful not to make assumptions based on commonly held myths about autism. Embrace your sons strengths and support him through his difficulties and above all love him for who he is you don't need to 'fix' him but he is likely to need some support and to be taught things that will help him to navigate this extremely stressful and unpredictable world. I understand how difficult it must be for parents so also be kind and gentle with yourself.... There will be a lot to learn but also a lot to gain. Keep posting here and we will help wherever we can.