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First Post - Need advice please

NAS67622

Hi, I guess I have found my way here not through clinical diagnosis but I guess concern out of instinct and love for my 3 year old son and in hope that someone else may have experienced a similar situation and could share some possible next steps.

We have already contacted the GP who advised reaching out to the health visitor but after a week of trying to get this support nobody has come back to us.  I now spend every minute of my time with him evaluating/assessing/guessing what is wrong (if anything) and is so upsetting as I'm beginning to forget what spending time with him without these feelings and without worry looks like. 

He has always been an 'intense' boy but have always used words like stubborn or energetic to rationalise his behaviour. We never previously thought anything could be wrong as he's so loving, interactive in play and socialble. He spends time with family, friends and nursery and no concerns have been raised. 

Lockdown hasn't been kind to us and can't begin to say exactly how it's impacted him but it's either changed him or made us realise what was always there. In summary it's been the most difficult time trying to handle this situation with our soon to be 2 year old and both continue to work. Interaction with others has been non existent and the pressure on us and him intensified. 

His behaviour has come more intense than ever, he doesn't listen to simple instructions and 75% of the time having to negotiate, he has regressed with his speach to almost babyish, has regressed with potty training significantly and almost like we're starting again after having him fully potty trained and mostly waking up with dry nappies. He has strange eye and head movements which dont make much sense to us. He used to roll his eyes back during bedtime hour but now does it regularly, sometimes shaking or nodding his head. He has become more aggressive and will lash out regularly to his sister and mummy and even this week randomly came to me during a conversation and kicked me. 

Like I said earlier one day more of having this strange relationship with him is one day too many and just really want some help or advice and help me get back to just loving him dearly. 

Thank you. 

Parents

  • From what you've posted, nothing sounds too worrying. Certainly doesn't sound like ASD. My daughter went through a phase exactly like you've described when she was 3. So did most of my friend's children. It's all pretty normal for that age. People talk about the terrible 2's but the worst stage usually hits when they are 3 (lots of info online if you look). It's to do with them not being able to understand or control their emotions yet, going through big developmental changes etc. You will find lots of  information and advice online, but to me it sounds like a normal 3 year old's behaviour, who is perhaps struggling even more due to lockdown. All my friends children under the age of 10 are playing up a lot more recently, including my daughter age 5 who in the last few weeks has started getting angry again, used baby talk, had toiletting accidents many times, lashed out at her brother. My cousins 4 year old has been the same and my friends 3 and 6 year olds also. It's a strange world for them at the moment

Reply

  • From what you've posted, nothing sounds too worrying. Certainly doesn't sound like ASD. My daughter went through a phase exactly like you've described when she was 3. So did most of my friend's children. It's all pretty normal for that age. People talk about the terrible 2's but the worst stage usually hits when they are 3 (lots of info online if you look). It's to do with them not being able to understand or control their emotions yet, going through big developmental changes etc. You will find lots of  information and advice online, but to me it sounds like a normal 3 year old's behaviour, who is perhaps struggling even more due to lockdown. All my friends children under the age of 10 are playing up a lot more recently, including my daughter age 5 who in the last few weeks has started getting angry again, used baby talk, had toiletting accidents many times, lashed out at her brother. My cousins 4 year old has been the same and my friends 3 and 6 year olds also. It's a strange world for them at the moment

Children
  • in reply to NAS67035

    Thank you so much, being so isolated it's difficult to understand what's normal or not. There have been some fairly signicant changes in behaviour and instinct kicks in. I spent many hours looking online reading and watching videos which if I'm honest led me here. I am aware that the Internet isn't the best place to go for advice which is why I thought I'd ask experts who live and breathe this. Thank you again for taking the time with such a nice reply.