Published on 12, July, 2020
My son is 24 years old and was diagnosed with Asperger syndrome nearly 4 years ago after suffering depression and anxiety. Since then has been living with his grandad and rarely leaves his bedroom. In the past four years, he has had counselling from various different people, been on antidepressants, had a support worker (albeit for a short time) and been on a ‘socialeyes’ course run by the local ASD team. He also attended a support group run by the ASD team (for one session only as he found it too overwhelming). All the support has now finished - either because ‘there’s nothing more we can offer him’ or ‘he is not ready for counselling’. The only thing that he attends is a weekly disability football session which he enjoys (although again can find this too much at times). Other than that he is very isolated and has no friends and fear and anxiety rule his life. This is heartbreaking for me as he was happy growing up and coped well with school until he went to university. I really don’t know what to do to help him and I would appreciate any ideas from people who have experienced a similar situation.
Hi, I can't really offer any advice but I just wanted to empathise with you as I am in a similar position with my 18 year old daughter. She had friends at school but due to being in a CAMHS unit for 2.75 years with anorexia she lost touch with them. She now has no friends. She only interacts with the others on her college course when the course work demands it. She is so lonely and I am at a loss as to how to help her largely because anything I suggest she is unlikely to do. She won't go to any ASD social events, won't join any clubs. Neither will she consider any help for her anxiety or depression (other than meds) because her perception of people trying to help her is based on her CAMHS experience, which was not good. I so want to help her but am at a loss as to what I can do.
I feel your pain, because it is heart rendering watching a previously happy child, whatever their age, struggle mentally and not be able to help them.
Thank you for your reply. It is heartbreaking to see your child struggling and not knowing how to help. I hope that this is a blip in their lives and they soon find something or someone to make them happy.