Published on 12, July, 2020
Daughter 17, was diagnosed with autism in July this year, she had been masking.
She has been struggling with making friends and has a lot of anxiety concerning this.
Attending 6th form College has become too much for her due to the travel and loneliness, therefore now studying online. Of course this has resulted in her becoming more isolated which we tried to talk to her about before she made the change but she wouldn't listen.
She hasn't done any studying for two weeks and has been spending a lot of time asleep. I understand that she might be tired if she has been coping with her day, but today for example she has not been out of the house and only just got out of bed (6pm). I've suggested that she might be depressed but she says no and won't let me make an appointment with the Dr's. Even if I did make one without her approval she would refuse to go. - she reckons that she will go to Uni next year and will make loads of friends and be away from her horrible parents... I've tried to suggest that she may not make friends for a variety of reasons but she won't listen and I'm being negative.. but as I've said she isn't doing any work...
I've tried to suggest different social groups both for autistic people but she won't go
I don't know what to say or do.... help...
Out of interest, what is your daughter hoping to study at university?
If it's the kind of course that typically attracts auties and nerds (I'm generalising, but anything in maths, computing and the physical sciences/engineering tends to have a higher proportion of students on the spectrum), then she might meet like-minds and make some good friends.
Alternatively, if she's more artistic but goes to a very academic university, then she may find herself around workaholics or living among more spectrum-type people anyway. Again, generalising, but if you're not able to get actual numbers from individual universities about how many autistic students they support, then these things might be a useful rule of thumb.
On an entirely separate note, I'm really pleased to hear the support group went well for you the other day. :-)
Nessie - she is hoping to Maths!!
So she's a proper smarty-pants, then?
That's awesome. I'm certain she'll meet some people like herself without too much effort. As others have said, you'll just have to make sure she has enough support so she can juggle her personal care with her studies and new friends.