Agressive Behaviour 5 year old.

Hi there. 

I am pretty much a newbie at this but I literally have nowhere left to turn. 

My son is now 5 and I've seen behavioural problems in him since he was about 2 1/2. It all started when he moved from the baby room in nursery to the bigger room. He is now in a foundation class in a mainstream school. 

Now I've been fighting for someone to see him since it all started. We've had biting (which he's outgrown) and now it's turned into full blown meltdowns. He throws things, kicks, slaps, screams and scares the other children. 

I was told in foundation 1 that he would be referred to an education psychologist who came to see him last year in May who said we needed to have and EHCP plan in place and also a referral to the CDC. 

We went to the CDC who then referred him for further assessment for suspected Autism (don't even get me started on the comments made in his report) 

His behaviour is getting worse and he's now been excluded twice from school. He isn't on a full timetable but rather on half days. 

The school is doing nothing. His EHCP still hasn't been sent off yet and it's A YEAR LATER! the senco says she's waiting for evidence. HOW MUCH EVIDENCE DO THEY NEED!!

I've got teachers actually telling me they don't feel safe around my 5 year old. I walked in the other day, after they'd phoned me to pick him up, and two teachers were restraining him on the floor which was making him 10 times worse. I want some sort of support in school as he responds well to 1-1 support but they're refusing until the EHCP is sent off and awarded (but they haven't sent it yet!) 

If he has a meltdown at school I then have to deal with it all day at home. He's agressive he trashes the house and to be quite honest I'm at breaking point. I don't know what to do, who to turn to next and even what to suggest. 

I do discipline him and he is sorry and he knows what he's doing is wrong but once he's in full blown mode there's no talking to him. 

I feel so sick leaving him at school. I become physically ill and can't sit still for worrying about what's happening when he's there. I don't like anyone ringing me in case school phones, I darent leave the house. 

It's a living nightmare and I'm getting very little support from school. 

Please has anyone got any advice?

Im literally at breaking point. 

Parents
  • Hi

    Welcome to the forum, I'm sorry you are having so many issues with your sons school, 

    Try the education rights pages on this site they are full of information on what the school must do and also the laws on excluding him due to disability. Call the helpline they can give specialist advice on this. 

    I am really disturbed that you found two teachers restraining him on the floor, were they normal teachers did they have training in restraint? In our school only a handful of senior teachers with training may do this and only in an emergency situation. 

    I'm sorry I'm not more helpful but wanted you to know someone is listening x

Reply
  • Hi

    Welcome to the forum, I'm sorry you are having so many issues with your sons school, 

    Try the education rights pages on this site they are full of information on what the school must do and also the laws on excluding him due to disability. Call the helpline they can give specialist advice on this. 

    I am really disturbed that you found two teachers restraining him on the floor, were they normal teachers did they have training in restraint? In our school only a handful of senior teachers with training may do this and only in an emergency situation. 

    I'm sorry I'm not more helpful but wanted you to know someone is listening x

Children
  • As far as I'm aware no they're not trained. 

    I gave permission for them to pick him up and move him and take his shoes off etc so he doesn't hurt anyone. One of the teaching assistant usually sits on the floor with him and like holds her arms around him. She's not touching him as such and he deals with that because she lets him kick his legs on the floor to try and release his anger at that point. 

    But this time the TA had his arms around him and his teacher was holding his ankles. So he couldn't kick .

    They were doing it to stop him throwing and hitting them. There were no kids in classroom at the time 

    This is the same teacher who told me she doesn't feel safe around him