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Teenager out of control and violent

paulponty

Posted about him many times I'm sure....
15 now, big lad. Got a diagnosis of Aspergers.

Not sure if its related to Aspergers or just general bad teenager behaviour. Like most he doesn't listen, makes a mess, is moody and stroppy. Normal I guess. One thing is he generally believes hes so hard done by and thinks we pick on him. In all honestly, he gets away with murder.

We try not to get into arguments with him. We warn him then we remove PC priveleges. But he wont take and gets VERY aggressive. He just cannot control himself. In the past, hes been violent towards me.

Today, after some typical lazy behaviour that he'd been warned for, he got a 1 day ban. Then he got in my wifes face in a very threatening way. Thing is he would have been back on there by tommorow but hes made it 1000x times worse now.

Hes a big lad. What do I do here? Yes understand teenagers can be a nightmare but surely being aggressive towards your mother is just a bit too far.
Ultimately, I can see me calling the Police one day and getting him arrested.

How to deal?

Parents

  • Hes off again. Twice in two weeks.

    Last night we found Coke all over the wall in the room where his PC is. We've got past experience with this sort of thing - hes lost his temper while playing computer games and broken things. Also, hes got a habit of something breaking (even if its an accident) and then just leaving it and not bothering to tell anyone.

    Anyway, so we're 99.99% sure hes done this. So wife has a calm word with him and asked him whats going on here. In about 3 seconds literally hes gone from 0 to 100. Hes up in his mothers face (2nd time in a week now), being really aggressive and swears blind that no-one ever believes him and hes got no idea how the Coke got up the wall.

    The things worrying us right now are:-

    1) His aggression. He seems to think if he disagrees with someone he can get up in their face and escalate things. Let alone the fact that this is his mother we're talking about here.

    2) He seems to think that hes not wrong. I've literally heard "I didn't do it and you always accuse me of lying" about 50 times. EVERY SINGLE TIME so far hes been found out. One time he is going to be telling the truth I know but still his average isn't good.

    What do we do?

    We've removed his PC privileges AGAIN. Mainly due to the unacceptable aggressive behaviour. In all honesty, if he'd admitted he'd done it straight away he would have been give a task to clean the wall, and a warning about his behaviour.

    I honestly don't know how hes going to cope in the real world as an adult.

Reply

  • Hes off again. Twice in two weeks.

    Last night we found Coke all over the wall in the room where his PC is. We've got past experience with this sort of thing - hes lost his temper while playing computer games and broken things. Also, hes got a habit of something breaking (even if its an accident) and then just leaving it and not bothering to tell anyone.

    Anyway, so we're 99.99% sure hes done this. So wife has a calm word with him and asked him whats going on here. In about 3 seconds literally hes gone from 0 to 100. Hes up in his mothers face (2nd time in a week now), being really aggressive and swears blind that no-one ever believes him and hes got no idea how the Coke got up the wall.

    The things worrying us right now are:-

    1) His aggression. He seems to think if he disagrees with someone he can get up in their face and escalate things. Let alone the fact that this is his mother we're talking about here.

    2) He seems to think that hes not wrong. I've literally heard "I didn't do it and you always accuse me of lying" about 50 times. EVERY SINGLE TIME so far hes been found out. One time he is going to be telling the truth I know but still his average isn't good.

    What do we do?

    We've removed his PC privileges AGAIN. Mainly due to the unacceptable aggressive behaviour. In all honesty, if he'd admitted he'd done it straight away he would have been give a task to clean the wall, and a warning about his behaviour.

    I honestly don't know how hes going to cope in the real world as an adult.

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