9 year old son, masks at school explodes at home

Hi , 

This is my first post on the forum. I have a nine year old boy who has been diagnosed with ASD for about a year now. He is very good at masking all the things that upset him whilst at school in fact we met with the head today who said he is a model student. The problem is it’s so hard for him to hold it together all day that at home where he can “get away with it” his behaviour is awful. The school are helpful but I really think he needs a professional to talk to. He refuses to talk about his feelings with my wife and I. Anyone know of any good counsellors etc in the Exeter, Devon area. 

Thanks

Parents
  • Unfortunately home is where there is the most trust so it tends to be a safe outlet for a child to show their most awful thoughts and feelings.

    Maybe you could ask the school if they could provide some opportunities for your son to have timeout to centre himself before he comes home. Schools tend to be very busy places with a lot of smells, sounds, people and social expectations and your boy is trying to navigate all of this without letting anyone know he is "different" to his peers. maybe he feels they won't accept him for being autistic. 

    Does he have any friends at school?he may settle some when some of the pressure is lifted.

    Sorry can't offer much help or advice

  • I agree.  It's quite common for autistic children to 'behave' at school and then have meltdowns at home.  Home is a safe environment, and the support there is usually unconditional.  I was far from a model student.  I was inattentive at school.  I also used to bunk off a lot because I found it such a hostile environment.  At home, on the other hand, I was very difficult.

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  • I agree.  It's quite common for autistic children to 'behave' at school and then have meltdowns at home.  Home is a safe environment, and the support there is usually unconditional.  I was far from a model student.  I was inattentive at school.  I also used to bunk off a lot because I found it such a hostile environment.  At home, on the other hand, I was very difficult.

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