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I'm running out of ideas.....!

bob

Hi

I'm new here so apologise now for starting off with a post like this!

My son has a range of difficulties including ASD.  I have managed to get him full time funding at school and a statement.  We have regular input from an art therapist at CAMHS (but they keep trying to discharge us).  We also have input from an OT and an SLT.

He has received 2 fixed term external exclusions from school over the past 2 weeks.

The first was one day - it was time for PE and his 1:1 suggested that he stay in his school polo shirt instead of changing into PE top.  He couldn't cope with that as it was 'wrong - you do PE in a white top.'  This resulted in him screaming and hitting out.  The note home said 'reason for exclusion - violence towards staff'

Several professionals (inc ed psych and peadiatrician), as well as me, had warned the school that an external exclusion would result in his attachment disorder flaring up which it now has (surprise surprise).  He has gone back nearly 2 years with his behaviours and lack of trust in adults as well as fear of being abandoned.

On Wednesday morning, he was playing on equipment outside when another child tried to push him off.  My son then pushed back but it was him who was told to get off.  He didn't think that was fair so started screaming and hitting out.  Again, an adult was hit when she came in 'to try and calm him down' (despite being told on several occassions not to in the past).  This has resulted in a 2 day external exclusion.

We have a re-integration meeting on Monday morning but he is scared to go back to school as he thinks everyone hates him and doesn't want him there.  He doesn't trust the adults there to sort things out for him again.  His annual review is in June and the Ed Psych is going to be there. 

As I already have a statement and full time funding for him; what else can I do? 

Its so unfair.  If he had dyslexia, he wouldn't get punished for not spelling a word correctly but he is being punished because he can't cope in social situations like other children do.

Parents

  • Hi Bob and Blossom

    I totally relate to you both. 

    My son has High Functioning Autism and ADHD.  We have had a very similar experience to you Blossom in our mainstream school and are swaying as to whether home school or part home school as no matter how many specialists are involved and no matter how many strategies are put in place, they still have a default position and attitude of conform or we will be cross and desperate to find a way to punish or issue sanctions.  I keep saying it the preventation of the anxiety we need to focus on not cure. 

    Can you lodge a formal legal complaint through the education system?  It is the only  thing that has made any headway for us and even now, the old attitude's are proving difficult to shake off.  I understood in Scotland at least, they cannot be excluded unless they are doing everything they can to support the child.  In your case they did not do everything they could have to support the child.  The forgot the basics and probably forgot to mention that on the report they complete regards the exclusion. Sadly, I think you have to get on their case.  Ask for copies of all relevant reports, NAS can give great advice on the Education helpline, find out where to complain to, write to your MP.  Kicking up a stir seems to be the only thing that stops them in their tracks as they start to be concerned for themselves then. 

    There are some very good mainstream schools out there with a great attitude and approach, but sadly they seem to be in the minority.

    Best wishes

     

Reply

  • Hi Bob and Blossom

    I totally relate to you both. 

    My son has High Functioning Autism and ADHD.  We have had a very similar experience to you Blossom in our mainstream school and are swaying as to whether home school or part home school as no matter how many specialists are involved and no matter how many strategies are put in place, they still have a default position and attitude of conform or we will be cross and desperate to find a way to punish or issue sanctions.  I keep saying it the preventation of the anxiety we need to focus on not cure. 

    Can you lodge a formal legal complaint through the education system?  It is the only  thing that has made any headway for us and even now, the old attitude's are proving difficult to shake off.  I understood in Scotland at least, they cannot be excluded unless they are doing everything they can to support the child.  In your case they did not do everything they could have to support the child.  The forgot the basics and probably forgot to mention that on the report they complete regards the exclusion. Sadly, I think you have to get on their case.  Ask for copies of all relevant reports, NAS can give great advice on the Education helpline, find out where to complain to, write to your MP.  Kicking up a stir seems to be the only thing that stops them in their tracks as they start to be concerned for themselves then. 

    There are some very good mainstream schools out there with a great attitude and approach, but sadly they seem to be in the minority.

    Best wishes

     

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