12 yo son refusing support in new high school

My 12 yo son just started high school and is refusing all support. He had 1:1 support for most of primary and more recently joined mainstream classes. He now desperately wants to be "like everyone else" and so won't accept help in class. Yet staff say he is unable to understand what to do or produce work at a level anywhere near what is required. He seems highly stressed watching the support staff, fearful they will approach him. He says he will "hide in the toilets" or not go to school if we make him have support. How do I help him understand and accept support in school? 

  • Social stories...but also you need to perhaps get the support staff to come and meet him at home so he gets to know them. 

    There are too many new things at once and I'm guessing he's using resisting help as a way of "stopping school"