Teenage diagnosis

I am a Mum of two sons who are both currently being assessed. They are both at senior school and it is only now that they are getting help. I have no idea what to expect and even if it is worth getting them diagnosed. We are coming up against lots of negativity regarding ASD from family and friends. Many comments are simply saying it doesn't exist and is just individuality! We know it is more complex than this, has anyone else had this experience? 

Parents
  • All I can say is that if there is enough indicators for you to feel they should be assessed, then you are doing the correct thing! I'd give anything to go back to my teenage years and voice the fact 'I'm not right' or 'I don't think like my peers do' and 'i can't cope'.

    My experience is: I'm 22 now and currently waiting to be assessed (I just got a confirmation letterrthat I'm on the waiting list to be allocated to a team member). I've spent years depressed, anxious and trying to 'grow out' of my 'shyness' and 'oddness'. I suspected (as did others) that it could be ASD, but I was in denial that I needed it confirmed. I dropped out of my honours year of university this year because of a meltdown. I nearly dropped out of high school in my 5th year because of a meltdown... I got no help back then, but I'm getting help now and hopefully will get my life back on track. 

    Don't let people tell you otherwise -  ASD exists, and just because they are high functioning and not as obviously affected.  It doesn't mean a darn thing inside! I was assessed as a child; they thought I had learning difficulties (I didn't). But the stigma of autism back then (especially) and the popular thought that girls were unlikely (and usually would have learning difficulties with autism) probably meant I fell through the cracks. My own mother admits she stopped pushing because she didn't want me to end up forced into a special needs school when she knew I didn't have learning difficulties. So, please, don't let ignorance of those around you stop you fighting for your kids. Maybe they don't have ASD, perhaps it is something else? Maybe it isn't anything? But what harm is there in ensuring they get assessed? 

    People told me I was just shy or I needed to be more confident for most of my life. Inside, I was crying, because I didn't and don't understand so much around me. I rely on google, books and how-to videos for the most ridiculous or normal things. I wanted to cry so much growing up, but I didn't, because I knew that nobody else cried about those things... I've felt like an alien my entire life. A foreign body in the world. I've never felt as if I belonged. I've raged because people didn't understand. I hated myself because I couldn't no matter how hard I tried be like everyone else.

    You are doing the right thing by having your kids assessed. Don't let anyone around you say otherwise. My own Mum wishes she'd pushed it for me after watching my deterioate over the past few years. I'm rooting for you and your boys. Whatever the outcome, you are doing exactly what a good parent does! 

Reply
  • All I can say is that if there is enough indicators for you to feel they should be assessed, then you are doing the correct thing! I'd give anything to go back to my teenage years and voice the fact 'I'm not right' or 'I don't think like my peers do' and 'i can't cope'.

    My experience is: I'm 22 now and currently waiting to be assessed (I just got a confirmation letterrthat I'm on the waiting list to be allocated to a team member). I've spent years depressed, anxious and trying to 'grow out' of my 'shyness' and 'oddness'. I suspected (as did others) that it could be ASD, but I was in denial that I needed it confirmed. I dropped out of my honours year of university this year because of a meltdown. I nearly dropped out of high school in my 5th year because of a meltdown... I got no help back then, but I'm getting help now and hopefully will get my life back on track. 

    Don't let people tell you otherwise -  ASD exists, and just because they are high functioning and not as obviously affected.  It doesn't mean a darn thing inside! I was assessed as a child; they thought I had learning difficulties (I didn't). But the stigma of autism back then (especially) and the popular thought that girls were unlikely (and usually would have learning difficulties with autism) probably meant I fell through the cracks. My own mother admits she stopped pushing because she didn't want me to end up forced into a special needs school when she knew I didn't have learning difficulties. So, please, don't let ignorance of those around you stop you fighting for your kids. Maybe they don't have ASD, perhaps it is something else? Maybe it isn't anything? But what harm is there in ensuring they get assessed? 

    People told me I was just shy or I needed to be more confident for most of my life. Inside, I was crying, because I didn't and don't understand so much around me. I rely on google, books and how-to videos for the most ridiculous or normal things. I wanted to cry so much growing up, but I didn't, because I knew that nobody else cried about those things... I've felt like an alien my entire life. A foreign body in the world. I've never felt as if I belonged. I've raged because people didn't understand. I hated myself because I couldn't no matter how hard I tried be like everyone else.

    You are doing the right thing by having your kids assessed. Don't let anyone around you say otherwise. My own Mum wishes she'd pushed it for me after watching my deterioate over the past few years. I'm rooting for you and your boys. Whatever the outcome, you are doing exactly what a good parent does! 

Children
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