Adult son and toileting...

Hi, I am not sure if I have posted this in the right place as I am new to the forum.

My son was diagnosed with High Functioning Autisim when he was 4, he had 3 years of speech thearpy and his early school years were uneventful and he had support.

He seems to have heightened senses of smell and touch and would not play in the sand or make 'mud pies'. He eats spare ribs and chicken on the bone with a knife and fork. These things do not constitute major issues but there is one thing that does and so far I haven't had any contact with someone who has this issue.

He is 19 now and has started an apprentaship which he has had to leave home to do, this in itself is a huge acheivement and we are very proud if not a little worried parents.

He has always had problems with doing a poo, he used to retch in the bathroom when he did go and would get distressed when wiping himself. I was still cleaning him right up to the age of 8/9. I put wet wipes in the bathroom to help, I'm ashamed to say I shouted at him quite a few times and it caused tension in my marriage. His underwear is permantly soiled, he leaves the loo in a state and now he has moved out and sharing bathroom facilities I am so worried about how he is managing this.

Has anyone had this problem or can anyone give advice please?

Parents
  • Hi Clovis,

    I received an email this morning with a further post on this thread which has not appeared yet. It confirmed my first suggestion that washing using a small baby bath or bidet would help alleviate this problem.

    It also like you criticised me for being unhelpful and accused me of being a self diagnosed fraud (just like the NHS did recently) Like most elderly sufferers it is assumed we are frauds because we have managed to survive into old age so cannot be autistic. I asked for an assessment and was refused as there are no services in my area nor funding.

    I am afraid this confirms my diagnosis is correct. If you read up on the definition of "autistic" you will find it means self absorbed, egotistical and narcissistic. Empathy is not one of my characteristics. I have PDA and a pathological need to tell the truth as I see it.

    But I have noticed the predominance of posts on this forum are from parents who are worried about their children and responders who pander to their fears and encourage them to demand schools and the NHS take responsibility for their failures.

    I could reveal my own personal history of contact with mental health services and the NHS as well as private psychotherapists but I choose not to.

    As to those who choose to judge others without any evidence I am too old to take any notice. Sorry.

    Take care, Laddie

Reply
  • Hi Clovis,

    I received an email this morning with a further post on this thread which has not appeared yet. It confirmed my first suggestion that washing using a small baby bath or bidet would help alleviate this problem.

    It also like you criticised me for being unhelpful and accused me of being a self diagnosed fraud (just like the NHS did recently) Like most elderly sufferers it is assumed we are frauds because we have managed to survive into old age so cannot be autistic. I asked for an assessment and was refused as there are no services in my area nor funding.

    I am afraid this confirms my diagnosis is correct. If you read up on the definition of "autistic" you will find it means self absorbed, egotistical and narcissistic. Empathy is not one of my characteristics. I have PDA and a pathological need to tell the truth as I see it.

    But I have noticed the predominance of posts on this forum are from parents who are worried about their children and responders who pander to their fears and encourage them to demand schools and the NHS take responsibility for their failures.

    I could reveal my own personal history of contact with mental health services and the NHS as well as private psychotherapists but I choose not to.

    As to those who choose to judge others without any evidence I am too old to take any notice. Sorry.

    Take care, Laddie

Children
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