I think is normal!

hello, I am waiting for help and diagnosis and so pleased I found this group.  I wanted to say something about hobbies and interests... I have always been told the things I have done over the years and even now is obsessive.  To me I don't see obsessive,I see a real interest in what I do or was doing at the time.

i can remember being a child and loving horses, I had to have everything that had horses on it! Bedding, clothing, books....all of it.  Out in shops with my parents as a child I could not leave something horse related on a shelf in a shop... It had to come with me.  Then one day my parents took me to a riding stables, I spent all my time in there! Before school, after school weekends...and lived in my riding clothes, would not take them off.  I was told I smelled like a horse.. Did not bother me I liked it.  When I moved some years later I was distraught I can't hold not go to the stables anymore, it upset me for ages. Then one day I just did not want to be around anything to do with horses, my mum had to empty my room of everything horsy as I refused to look at it all.

that was as a child...then growing up I got fixated in books, Stephen King books.  I needed them, all of them, I liked the look, feel and smell of them...they had to be new, no second hand ones.  I did not read them, I have never read a book in my life, I struggle with that with having dyslexia, dyspraxia and dyscalculia.  I just cannot get into a book, its just words and I cannot make the conection with the story. I cannot picture things in my head either so reading books just does not work for me... I later found out that I am a kinaesthetic learner so makes perfect sense! I think collecting books was my way of looking normal and trying to fit in as I knew people that read and collected books. Silly I know but I want so much to fit in and be accepted.

there have been lots of other things I get fixated on, when this happens I cannot stop thinking about it and need to interact with it, the books, I used to just feel and look at th covers...moving them on the shelf.  

Has anyone else been like this? I guess I just want to feel accepted here too...

Parents
  • Hi Happydora,

    I have always been obsessed with trying to understand the world we live in more and bore people by talking about that rather than the small talk and nonsense most NT's indulge in when they socialise with each other. I have collected a large number of books over the years and read many books I got from the library too. I am not attracted to fiction but prefer autobiographies or other factual stories. What is the point of fiction? It's made up out of someone's imagination, rather than actual facts. Just like the bible.

    I am afraid of horses having fallen off one when I was a teenager on the only occasion I ever tried to ride. Put me off for life. They are very intelligent creatures and can sense when a rider is scared I think. I know I was. I prefer mechanical means of transport. Is that how your knee got damaged from riding horses? I have always wondered why women love horses so much and like to be around them. I was told once it's the smell of them but that may not be true for everyone.

    What does kinaesthetic mean? I can't find it in the dictionary.

    Take care, laddie.

Reply
  • Hi Happydora,

    I have always been obsessed with trying to understand the world we live in more and bore people by talking about that rather than the small talk and nonsense most NT's indulge in when they socialise with each other. I have collected a large number of books over the years and read many books I got from the library too. I am not attracted to fiction but prefer autobiographies or other factual stories. What is the point of fiction? It's made up out of someone's imagination, rather than actual facts. Just like the bible.

    I am afraid of horses having fallen off one when I was a teenager on the only occasion I ever tried to ride. Put me off for life. They are very intelligent creatures and can sense when a rider is scared I think. I know I was. I prefer mechanical means of transport. Is that how your knee got damaged from riding horses? I have always wondered why women love horses so much and like to be around them. I was told once it's the smell of them but that may not be true for everyone.

    What does kinaesthetic mean? I can't find it in the dictionary.

    Take care, laddie.

Children
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