Dont know how to start this...
All my life i have felt self conscious. Even then i am not sure thats the right term? I have never felt comfotable in my own skin. Never been good with words, written or spoken. And now i have joined NAS, and all i do is type short replies to peoples heartfelt post's, never really giving advice, just trying to fit in i suppose.
Its not that i dont care. More i am trying to phrase things right so i dont cause offence. So i say little to hopefully get it right. I just feel i do not have enough knoweledge yet to offer advice on this very wide and complicated subject. Ok i know how i am, how i have problems in certain areas, but the last thing that i want is to cause offence or have someone tell me "You don't know what your on about".
Its been a long journey to get where i am(my assessment), to hopefully get some answers. Maybe its not ASD, least i'll know.
I am constantly fighting this war inside of me. I want to scream, but can't. People just tell me "you are just you", but i cannot except that. Things scare me. Life scares. People scare me.
Why???
I am so tired, but have trouble sleeping. I get anxious over silly things. I feel invisible sometimes.
I dont know if anyone can relate to this, but i just had to write this.
Thanks for listening guys
Blues