Did you have a 'Road to Damascus Moment'

For those of us who have only been diagnosed/suspect they have an ASD in 'later life', was it a Damascus moment that made you realise that there was actually a condition you had which made you different? 

In my case, I have always been absent minded.  And often my mother would say I was like a man made of smoke, meaning I think that I had no grasp of the situation.  She has told me that no one would ever know if I had Alzheimers as I always forget where I have put things. But I could also remember things I had read, having a mental picture of the page and 'reading' it verbatim from my mind and also 'replaying' peoples convesations, and 'replaying' events from my life as if was on a dvd (in modern terms).

And my feeding habits -well I have a very 'restricted' diet always, hating most strongly tasting food, certain things like curry I can't bear to be in the same room as.  I found this very embarrassing as I got into adulthood, having to be in places where meals were served up.  Nowadays, I just  make it clear that I don't like the food beforehand and leave it at that.

At school I was very inconsistent.  I was bottom of the class one term and top another.  I used to excel at subjects that interested me (Maths and Chemistry) and not be bothered at all about subjects that didn't (English Literature and History).  But history is a strange one.  I used to not like the history we were taught.  I'd spend night after night reading science text books and history text books.  In my O leve exam for History, I managed to pass not by answering subjects we had been taught but by choosing questions on other topics.

After an indifferent spell at College, I was out of work for more than twenty years.  Not for lack of trying, just failed all the interviews.  When I saw an occupational psychologist he said I was not making proper eye contact and not elaborating on answers.  So if I was asked if I had experience of x,y,z I would say 'No' and leave it at that, not say 'No, but I have done ...... which I think is similar.

Years later I was told I was not answering the questions put but answering something else, waffling on about irrelevances, staring and sitting bolt upright.

But still no suggestion something might be wrong in my makeup.

A couple of years ago 'Embarrassing Bodies' bought up the subject of ASD's and directed viewers to do an online test.  I scored highly, meaning a strong possibility.  I mentioned this to work colleagues who said things like'you don't say' but to me it didn't seem a problem.  Yes, I did go on about certain things at work and sometimes someone would say 'Your phone is ringing' but when I got there it wasn't, didn't realise that it was just their way of getting rid of me!

Then things happened at work, not least being moved out of my comfort zone and told that I had to do things a certain way (even though there was nothing wrong with the way I did them) and I began to wonder.  I did the ASD test again and again scored high.  Did some more research and everything seemed to fall into place with my childhood experiences.  And my one regret is not knowing all these years!

Parents
  • I agree with you about the Australian Question Intonation, Tom. I mean why would you make a statement sound like a question? It's a misuse of the language, or maybe it's just because I've become a grumpy old man.

    But I think the thing with fashion is something that has grown and grown ever since the mass media got going in terms of cinema, TV, magazines newspapers, catalogues and so on. I think it has and still is driven by big business because by encouraging people to keep up with the latest fashions it generates load of dosh and everyone is happy (well the bankers are anyway).

    However, that doesn't really get to the heart of the question as to why many people feel compelled to follow fashion. Is it an evolutionary thing in that it tends to favour individuals who blindly follow the herd and are therby accepted as a member of the clique? In primitive times this might have been an important characteristic of people insofar as those 'rebels' who refused to 'blend in' might have been seen as being outsiders and consequently not contributing to tribal coherence and, as a result, being ostrasized, which could have been fatal in a very uncertain and dangerous world. I don't know, it was just a thought. 

    I expect there have always been those who have been 'different' from the average but before the population of the world ballooned so dramatically and the era of mass comminucation they could be accomodated without the burden of being made to feel strange in comparison to the rest of society. It's been speculated upon by Prof.Tony Attwood that many Aspies would probably have gone into monastries where they could lead a comparatively secluded and quiet life away from the violent and brutal mass of people. They would perform their routine tasks, something Aspies like to do, and perhaps even produce those wonderfully illustrated Bible translations we so admire. Not sure about sex though....Ahem!

Reply
  • I agree with you about the Australian Question Intonation, Tom. I mean why would you make a statement sound like a question? It's a misuse of the language, or maybe it's just because I've become a grumpy old man.

    But I think the thing with fashion is something that has grown and grown ever since the mass media got going in terms of cinema, TV, magazines newspapers, catalogues and so on. I think it has and still is driven by big business because by encouraging people to keep up with the latest fashions it generates load of dosh and everyone is happy (well the bankers are anyway).

    However, that doesn't really get to the heart of the question as to why many people feel compelled to follow fashion. Is it an evolutionary thing in that it tends to favour individuals who blindly follow the herd and are therby accepted as a member of the clique? In primitive times this might have been an important characteristic of people insofar as those 'rebels' who refused to 'blend in' might have been seen as being outsiders and consequently not contributing to tribal coherence and, as a result, being ostrasized, which could have been fatal in a very uncertain and dangerous world. I don't know, it was just a thought. 

    I expect there have always been those who have been 'different' from the average but before the population of the world ballooned so dramatically and the era of mass comminucation they could be accomodated without the burden of being made to feel strange in comparison to the rest of society. It's been speculated upon by Prof.Tony Attwood that many Aspies would probably have gone into monastries where they could lead a comparatively secluded and quiet life away from the violent and brutal mass of people. They would perform their routine tasks, something Aspies like to do, and perhaps even produce those wonderfully illustrated Bible translations we so admire. Not sure about sex though....Ahem!

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