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Some Friend

Normalish

Hello there, good afternoon. 

Just popping here to vent, I suppose, because I'm reeling from something my one and only friend said to me in conversation yesterday, and it's absolutely ruined my sleep.

On the topic of my being much too stubborn and unable to accept another person's perspective, she offered her opinion and said, directly, that she feels I use my "autism card" too frequently.

I'm in turmoil as to what to make of that statement. I don't think it's fair, but... Am I the best person to judge? I thought I made a conscious effort not to blame/refer everything on my diagnosis, but... Maybe it's failing?

In a further effort to clarify the comment, she assured me she was only looking to make sure that I was "using the autism as an excuse to act like a *** to people and make out like you're never wrong".

Which... I know even less what to do with...! My head is mashed!

So does anyone have any opinions? Not necessarily to vindicate either of us in that conversation, but perhaps just on how I process such remarks, and what I attempt to respond with!

Thank you, and I hope you're all well.

Dan 

Parents
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous

    You can't change but you can learn strategies. I did not intend to come across that you needed to change, I was just to trying to encourage you to accept the shortcomings of a muggle.

    Yes, your friend probably needs to back off. They are probably in the mistaken belief you can change. We can't change the way our brains are wired anymore than a leopard can change its spots.

    Over the years I've tried to take situations like this on board as a leaning excercise in what upsets 'normal' people so as to at least try to avoid these kinds of situations.

    Don't beat yourself up about it.

    Have a look at this: www.afieldguidetoearthlings.com/AFGTE_web_p7-30.pdf It might help.

    More info at: www.afieldguidetoearthlings.com/

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous

    You can't change but you can learn strategies. I did not intend to come across that you needed to change, I was just to trying to encourage you to accept the shortcomings of a muggle.

    Yes, your friend probably needs to back off. They are probably in the mistaken belief you can change. We can't change the way our brains are wired anymore than a leopard can change its spots.

    Over the years I've tried to take situations like this on board as a leaning excercise in what upsets 'normal' people so as to at least try to avoid these kinds of situations.

    Don't beat yourself up about it.

    Have a look at this: www.afieldguidetoearthlings.com/AFGTE_web_p7-30.pdf It might help.

    More info at: www.afieldguidetoearthlings.com/

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