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my son's growing interests

bootsy

Hi everyone,

Its been a while since I've been on this website - so much to do as I'm a student.  Funny - my 14yr old son is no longer a 'student' but me, (his mother is!)

I just wanted to say that when I took my son out of school, to be home educated. The teachers implied that he would come to nothing - we were making a big mistake and that I should insist on him going to school.  I told them,'It just isn't happeneing'.  This happened before his ASD diagnosis.

Since then I have struggled with myself, thinking that I should be doing more but I need not have worried.  Since he has left school, his creative personality has been allowed to flourish.  At school, he did not like reading (he has ADHD too) or appearing 'uncool' in front of his friends by being interested in subjects.

He is writing a science fiction book with the most amazing ability for description;  for instance in describing the main character he wrote, ''he looked like an unfinished Picasso, left out in the rain'.  When I read this, I felt overwhelmed and touched by his poetic use of words.  He doesn't understand my excitement for his talent and underplays it. So, with his permission I asked someone who does not know him to read his work and his feedback finally led to my son feeling a little bit proud of himself.  This in itself was a remarkable step forward - a step up in his own self worth!

Yesterday, he whispered to me that he is reading a Shakespeare play and that he loves it and finds it inspiring.

I am beside myself that he has found some joy in his life.  At last, I do not give myself such a hard time over not knowing how to help him as it seems that given the time and space and letting things just be, he is not only educating himself but finding his own way in this world.

I am, howver, left with one big worry, his isolation. On the one hand, his isolation has played a part in him finding his creativity, on the other hand, I feel that he is missing out on some social interaction but does he?

Thanks for listening!

Bootsy

  • 'Love comforteth like sunshine after rain' - Venus and Adonis. One of Willy's early ones.

    I learned far more relevant and interesting things after I left school. I found that teachers didn't like to be questioned, told they are wrong or discuss anything that's not up on the black board.

    History at school was a waste of time I thought. Each year we covered Hendry the 8th and his penchant for spousal abuse. Had they have said 'Hendry the 8th was a glutenous misogynistic git' then that would have saved 5 years.

  • I can't find the 'Picasso/left out in the rain' line as an exact quotation, but the phrase "left out in the rain" is a common one in many songs and films because of the song 'MacArthur Park', as covered by a lot of artists... it's not an uncommon phrase, and it may well be a case of remembering rather than conscious borrowing and use. 

    Well, George Harrison managed that as a creative defence of 'My Sweet Lord'...

    For the OP:I think the challenge is to keep him busy reading and exploring. You might find that if he's interested in writing, the way to introduce new book is to say that they are different way of writing that he might like to explore, to see how other people use phrases and different words. You may well want to check what age range the books are suitable for, though - I remember learning my first choice set of swearwords from a Douglas Adams novel.

  • Hi Scorpion0x17,

    Thanks for your reply - this is very interesting - my son does not read, as much as I have tried to encourage it over the years. He has taken an interest, recently in Shakespeare but that is all.   I'll ask him about that description though, maybe he picked it up from somewhere.

    Thank you for pointing this out!

    Best wishes

    Bootsy

  • I hate to put a downer on things, bootsy, but does your son read a lot of Sci-Fi (particularly Iain (M) Banks and/or William Gibson)? and are you sure that what he writes is 'his own work', as it were?

    I ask, because I enjoy reading Sci-Fi, and particularly Banks and Gibson, myself, and I'm sure I've seen the description "he looked like an unfinished Picasso, left out in the rain" somewhere before.

    I could be mistaken, of course.

  • Hi Bootsy,

    Home schooling does not have to be an isolating experience.  I home-schooled my AS son for 2 years and we accessed a local home education network.  A brief search on the internet will probably help you access one in your area.  Home-educating families often get together for shared activities and socials, and are generally welcoming of new members, in my experience.  They sometimes have creative writing workshops and book groups too.  If there isn't one in your local area, your son might like to start one!

    All the best,

    Suki

  • Hi Bootsy,

    Might be something for the future, and it wouldn't address face-to-face isolation, but you could look into some of the online spaces for creative writing and support?

    There's lots of websites where people sharing writing, enter contests through forums, support each other's work - it may be a way to help your son use this creativity to be in contact with other people.

    We'd clearly recommend looking carefully at any possible resource though, to make sure what's appropriate for his age and that any writing community was supportive rather than overly critical. But I know a fair few writers who've found the experience really supportive.

    You might also find some useful information in the following article about home schooling -
    http://www.autism.org.uk/living-with-autism/education/primary-and-secondary-school/education-home-educating-your-child.aspx

    I know other people on the forum have been home schooled or are home schooling their own children so they may have more to add about how to address issues of isolation.

    And always great to hear there's a new Shakespeare fan, what a writer Smile