Negative Feedback Loop

Trogluddite said:

The things that I still can't explain, I'll blame on the person I'm focusing on if I already feel negative about that person, otherwise I'll blame myself.  This is even when nobody has actually accused anyone of having done anything wrong!

And the relief when someone sets it right by reassuring me what really probably happened, it's such a weight lifted off me.  I'll be a bit exhausted for a little while, but my mood can bounce back very quickly.

This interview with Tony Attwood speaks about the catastrophising trait...

www.youtube.com/watch

Close to what you were thinking of?

Just reading that, I could actually cry at that point. Exactly me. That's me. The things I can't explain, like you, I blame someone else, or blame me. No one is upset with me. No one has done anything for me to be upset about. But Im upset about it. 

I've spent ten years questionning my sexuality when I was younger, constantly ruminating over the question, Am I Gay. Im not. I tried. Im definitely not. But it still doesn't stop my mind from having these thought. They appear to be fairly mild compared to actual obsessiveness. But none-the-less, my mind needs something to focus on and obsess about.

After Christmas, it was "Do I have ASD". In February, I had a new obsession.

My mind needs to find answers to problems. I don't know how common that is. When I can't get those answers, the frustration, the confusion, is always there.

Like you, someone sets me straight, as it was, this person set me straight and spent time explaining what was going on and I calmed down instantly. I went from "This is the worst person in the world" back to "This is the best person in the world" in a matter" or seconds.

I never, ever realised I was doing this before. But I am. I can see what's going on now, and it all seems so much clearer. I can now see the patterns occurring, see what's going on. I even apologised to someone I did that to last year, and the year before that, and the year before that.

It's funny. But tragic too. 

It just all feels like it's starting to make sense. 

Trogluddite said:

The things that I still can't explain, I'll blame on the person I'm focusing on if I already feel negative about that person, otherwise I'll blame myself.  This is even when nobody has actually accused anyone of having done anything wrong!

And the relief when someone sets it right by reassuring me what really probably happened, it's such a weight lifted off me.  I'll be a bit exhausted for a little while, but my mood can bounce back very quickly.

This interview with Tony Attwood speaks about the catastrophising trait...

www.youtube.com/watch

Close to what you were thinking of?

Just reading that, I could actually cry at that point. Exactly me. That's me. The things I can't explain, like you, I blame someone else, or blame me. No one is upset with me. No one has done anything for me to be upset about. But Im upset about it. 

I've spent ten years questionning my sexuality when I was younger, constantly ruminating over the question, Am I Gay. Im not. I tried. Im definitely not. But it still doesn't stop my mind from having these thought. They appear to be fairly mild compared to actual obsessiveness. But none-the-less, my mind needs something to focus on and obsess about.

After Christmas, it was "Do I have ASD". In February, I had a new obsession.

My mind needs to find answers to problems. I don't know how common that is. When I can't get those answers, the frustration, the confusion, is always there.

Like you, someone sets me straight, as it was, this person set me straight and spent time explaining what was going on and I calmed down instantly. I went from "This is the worst person in the world" back to "This is the best person in the world" in a matter" or seconds.

I never, ever realised I was doing this before. But I am. I can see what's going on now, and it all seems so much clearer. I can now see the patterns occurring, see what's going on. I even apologised to someone I did that to last year, and the year before that, and the year before that.

It's funny. But tragic too. 

It just all feels like it's starting to make sense.