Appointment with my local Mental Health Team

Hi again, Undiagnosed, at the risk of repeating myself ad infinitum, you're getting over involved. Your mind is taking in far more information than it can process, and the ensuing welter of confused thoughts, coupled with your desperation to 'get it right' is leading you up the garden path.

We have often discussed this particular point before, so please take it as being fully acknowledged by most of us on here:

Whilst there are things we all have in common, what affects us, and how, is a constantly shifting thing. This is the main problem with 'tick lists' - and you have fallen for it just as others have - just because a 'trait' is listed doesn't mean it's a requirement. If you can't 'tick' a particular box, it has no particular meaning. It might even be the case that as you come to know yourself better, you suddenly realise that you could have ticked the box, but if you can't, it really doesn't matter.

We cannot possibly diagnose you. You can't diagnose yourself. When I advised you to stop doing what you're now doing, it was to try and protect you from yourself, and I'm sorry that you rejected the advice. No amount of writing, editing, questioning or discussion is going to affect your assessement.

The list we advised you to make was purely for your GP. They should know enough to understand a 'list' and be able to put you forward for proper investigation, but after that it becomes fairly meaningless. Feel free to write a book about yourself if you wish, but don't expect anyone to pay attention to it - your assessement is verbal, it's a dynamic conversation, not a discussion of tick lists.

IT IS NOT NECESSARY, NOT IN ANY WAY, SHAPE OR FORM, FOR 'ALL OF THE PIECES TO FIT'. It doesn't work like that. What's more, you don't even understand yourself yet, this is all new and overwhelming, and it's distressing you hugely - we can see that perfectly clearly, and most of us have the same thing in our own histories.

I've emphasised this time and again to you, but still you aren't getting it. I can't stop you obsessing over it, but I can tell you how much time and energy you're wasting over it, and it's simply because you won't sit back and trust that people who know what they're doing, know what they're doing.

Your experience is not going to be the same as mine, or anyone else's. When I describe things that happen to me, I am describing me, not autistic people. Some AS people will identify with what I say and tell me it happens to them too. Others will fail to understand it at all, and some will say they get something similar but far less intense. That's quite a range of experiences, but amongst people who all have AS in common. You need to be clear about this.

Assessment is holistic, complex, and carried out by people who have trained specificaly in understanding spectrum conditions. They will talk to you, not sit there with a 'tick list' and mark them off. Furthermore, if you don't exhibit a particular 'trait' it is not an automatic 'fail'. The only way that you are ever going to begin to understand yourself will be after you are told your diagnosis. Untill then, the question remains open, and there's nothing more typicaly AS in flavour than being driven crazy by a question that remains open...

Hi again, Undiagnosed, at the risk of repeating myself ad infinitum, you're getting over involved. Your mind is taking in far more information than it can process, and the ensuing welter of confused thoughts, coupled with your desperation to 'get it right' is leading you up the garden path.

We have often discussed this particular point before, so please take it as being fully acknowledged by most of us on here:

Whilst there are things we all have in common, what affects us, and how, is a constantly shifting thing. This is the main problem with 'tick lists' - and you have fallen for it just as others have - just because a 'trait' is listed doesn't mean it's a requirement. If you can't 'tick' a particular box, it has no particular meaning. It might even be the case that as you come to know yourself better, you suddenly realise that you could have ticked the box, but if you can't, it really doesn't matter.

We cannot possibly diagnose you. You can't diagnose yourself. When I advised you to stop doing what you're now doing, it was to try and protect you from yourself, and I'm sorry that you rejected the advice. No amount of writing, editing, questioning or discussion is going to affect your assessement.

The list we advised you to make was purely for your GP. They should know enough to understand a 'list' and be able to put you forward for proper investigation, but after that it becomes fairly meaningless. Feel free to write a book about yourself if you wish, but don't expect anyone to pay attention to it - your assessement is verbal, it's a dynamic conversation, not a discussion of tick lists.

IT IS NOT NECESSARY, NOT IN ANY WAY, SHAPE OR FORM, FOR 'ALL OF THE PIECES TO FIT'. It doesn't work like that. What's more, you don't even understand yourself yet, this is all new and overwhelming, and it's distressing you hugely - we can see that perfectly clearly, and most of us have the same thing in our own histories.

I've emphasised this time and again to you, but still you aren't getting it. I can't stop you obsessing over it, but I can tell you how much time and energy you're wasting over it, and it's simply because you won't sit back and trust that people who know what they're doing, know what they're doing.

Your experience is not going to be the same as mine, or anyone else's. When I describe things that happen to me, I am describing me, not autistic people. Some AS people will identify with what I say and tell me it happens to them too. Others will fail to understand it at all, and some will say they get something similar but far less intense. That's quite a range of experiences, but amongst people who all have AS in common. You need to be clear about this.

Assessment is holistic, complex, and carried out by people who have trained specificaly in understanding spectrum conditions. They will talk to you, not sit there with a 'tick list' and mark them off. Furthermore, if you don't exhibit a particular 'trait' it is not an automatic 'fail'. The only way that you are ever going to begin to understand yourself will be after you are told your diagnosis. Untill then, the question remains open, and there's nothing more typicaly AS in flavour than being driven crazy by a question that remains open...