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My son will not wash/wear deodorant

Debs75

Hello,

I have major issues with my 14 year old son. Biggest issue as well as others is his

Total lack of hygiene. He washes in water only, and refuses to wear deodorant of

Any form or kind. Which leads him to be very stinky. I fear school peers are going

To bully him, as well as its not healthy for him.

Have told the dr we are seeing,she hasn't really addressed the issue, she's more concerned about the other issues we are having.

Has anyone got any ideas please ??

He doesn't care less about his hygiene,yet it makes me physically sick the smells so bad.

We can't get though to him...I understand its a link to the autism he has.the touch the feel ect. But wot can u do ??? I'm on my knees !!! I give up...Have run out ideas or any hope.

Feeling dragged down, so many issues....you guys are my lifeline...

Debbie

Parents

  • Our son has consistently refused all help, treatment or assessments and won't discuss things.  When the letter about the assessment appointments came through he simply asserted that he doesn't have autism and got angry about them sending it.  So, in the interests of keeping a trusting relationship, we supported him in not taking it any further whilst silently wondering what on earth we were going to do.  He seems very fixed in his belief that his own interpretations are correct and unassailable and it seems that, whilst living under the same roof, we inhabit different worlds.  I feel quite broken about it and don't know how to build bridges when he's so withdrawn.  This means I'm generally torn when it comes to practicalities like having a wash - I don't want the only communication I have with him during the day to be me asking him to do things but if I don't poke my head round the door to keep nudging him over a period of days it just doesn't happen.  I try to make sure most of my nudges are about positive things like meals I know he'll enjoy, takeaways or offers of somewhere to go together (always refused) then every 4 -5 times ask about having a wash or a bath.  Either way, there's a good chance of a monsyllabic answer or even none at all.  I don't know where our relationship has gone and we are the people closest to him.  :(          

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  • Our son has consistently refused all help, treatment or assessments and won't discuss things.  When the letter about the assessment appointments came through he simply asserted that he doesn't have autism and got angry about them sending it.  So, in the interests of keeping a trusting relationship, we supported him in not taking it any further whilst silently wondering what on earth we were going to do.  He seems very fixed in his belief that his own interpretations are correct and unassailable and it seems that, whilst living under the same roof, we inhabit different worlds.  I feel quite broken about it and don't know how to build bridges when he's so withdrawn.  This means I'm generally torn when it comes to practicalities like having a wash - I don't want the only communication I have with him during the day to be me asking him to do things but if I don't poke my head round the door to keep nudging him over a period of days it just doesn't happen.  I try to make sure most of my nudges are about positive things like meals I know he'll enjoy, takeaways or offers of somewhere to go together (always refused) then every 4 -5 times ask about having a wash or a bath.  Either way, there's a good chance of a monsyllabic answer or even none at all.  I don't know where our relationship has gone and we are the people closest to him.  :(          

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