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Dealing with emotions when people snap at you.

KaloJaro

Hi,

Recently been having more trouble when it comes to normal people again, but my main concern is trying to sort out my emotions. It could be I'm getting stressed over an upcoming uni interview but still...

All my life whenever someone snaps at me I always feel lost, helpless and scared. Often I will end up avoiding said person for days even weeks because every time I see them the memory of them snapping at me comes up, along with the same overwhelming emotions, leaving me feeling unwanted and as though its best if I just 'stay out of the way' even if the person is trying to include me.

Normally I try to let the emotions run their course until I forget or get distracted by something else but recently been snapped at by my mum (shes wound up for some reason that everyone else seems to know except me, which doesn't help) who is often the first person I turn to with advice for my emotions, shes also the one taking me on a 5-6 hour car drive to the uni I'm applying for next wednesday (30th Nov) meaning it'll be impossible to avoid her.

Any ideas, tips or coping strategies?

Parents

  • Hi,

    As a mum who is guilty of snapping at times. Please try and remember that we do snap at everyone at somepoint and it is a sign that we are struggling with our emotions too not a personal attack on the person we snap at, it is true that we often snap at those we are closest too. But I think what most NT's are bad for is not realising the upset this causes. I love my son so much and will always be there to help him even if I have snapped at him just two minutes before.

    I agree that talking things out with your mum is the best cause of action. Tell her that you realise that something has upset her and that other people seem to know what that is and that you dont know it. Tell her you are nervous around her because she snapped at you and you dont know why. Tell her you are nervous about uni, it might be tht she is nervous about uni and or the drive there too. As you said in your post that your mum is the person you turn to normaly, there is no reason not to turn to her now.

    Hope this helps, best of luck with uni interview and geting things sorted with your mum.

    Sam

    x

Reply

  • Hi,

    As a mum who is guilty of snapping at times. Please try and remember that we do snap at everyone at somepoint and it is a sign that we are struggling with our emotions too not a personal attack on the person we snap at, it is true that we often snap at those we are closest too. But I think what most NT's are bad for is not realising the upset this causes. I love my son so much and will always be there to help him even if I have snapped at him just two minutes before.

    I agree that talking things out with your mum is the best cause of action. Tell her that you realise that something has upset her and that other people seem to know what that is and that you dont know it. Tell her you are nervous around her because she snapped at you and you dont know why. Tell her you are nervous about uni, it might be tht she is nervous about uni and or the drive there too. As you said in your post that your mum is the person you turn to normaly, there is no reason not to turn to her now.

    Hope this helps, best of luck with uni interview and geting things sorted with your mum.

    Sam

    x

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