Can you suggest a good book on autism?

I don't normally read books, but was advised to get this book when I was diagnosed, by the Advisor who worked with me from The National Autistic Society.

I found that when I read the book.....thinking 'I do that'.

I found it very helpful, and easy to read even though it is a big book.

 - it's a booklet rather than a book, and covers a lot from the young adult's point of view.

This is available online, and I think it is pretty good:

www-users.cs.york.ac.uk/.../

Someone signposted me Anxiety and Autism - another Jessica Kingsley book and you can get that on kindle too.  I was sceptical but yes it was a good read as in informative and accessible. I didn't have to understand autism very much to understand what was being written. This was the only book I read pre diagnosis. It aimed for adults and explained to me why some things were as they are for me even before the diagnosis. 

Information online is limiited especially about female adults. But Planet is a good resource website if your partner and father are up for technology that is.

Hi Redd. Excuse me, but my compliments to Grandad and his grandaughter IS 'perfect', it's just that there's an extra dimension to her life that they don't yet grasp.

Grandad's grandaughter is the same person he's known for 18 years. 

There came a point after my diagnosis where I talked with as many family members as I could, to tell them. My Nieces, God bless them, said 'but you're still the Uncle ****** that we've always known, and we love you even if you are slightly odd, so what does this change?'.

I told them that I consider that both my Mum, and my sister were the same, as well as one of my own Uncles. Also, people have talked before about the 'family thingy' that everyone considered to be something 'not quite right', but no-one could or would discuss it. This I believe to be the AS trait. In the case of my Uncle, he was sectioned to a mental hospital when I was very little, but back then he had no hope of a proper diagnosis.

Everyone was 'ashamed' of having a 'loony' in the family, so it was never ever discussed. Imagine, the poor man had no help, isolated even by his own family, and he was an absolutely lovely man. This cannot, and must not, happen to our children.

So I told them all to spread the word, and to watch their own children for signs. Their reaction was almost universaly 'there's nothing wrong with my children'. I never said that there was, I said that there was every chance of doing irreparable harm to an undiagnosed AS person, and that if they chose to ignore this and did do such harm, that I never wanted to hear them missuse the word 'parent' about themselves again.

That brought the more intelligent ones up sharp.

There is nothing 'wrong' with your daughter, she is simply a different, indeed rare, individual, capable of everything that any other child is capable of, and very possibly more. If you treat her as 'able' instead of 'disabled', she will do the same as anyone else, which is 'all that she is able to do'. What more can you ask?

The best thing that your partner and Grandad can do is come onto this website and talk to us - we very much want to help, that's why we're here and choosing to answer people such as you

They're spending time doing the wrong thing. Longman knows his stuff with the books, follow his suggestions. I use the Tony Attwood book, and while it's certainly aimed at children, and indeed there are, as Longman points out, some real errors of omission, I have still found it to be a good rough guide to my inner Aspie child. However, my greatest help, support and understanding has come from talking with, and reading, other AS people. This will not always be appropriate to everyone, but I recommend it as a first stop for NTs.

I hope that you feel we're trying to be helpful and supportive, 'cos we are!

Thanks very much for your response, I will look at the books you've suggested. I think my Dad is in denial - he's 84 and is stunned that his "perfect" grand daughter has this to deal with.  My partner simply has no terms of reference, he has no idea about autism whatsoever. Their expectations are difficult for her to live up to and while a challenge is always a positive thing, this is an uphill struggle for her because they just don't understand.

Thanks for your help  

Books explaining autism in adults seem few and far between, and can be hard going. There seem to be more around on Asperger's than on more marked autism, probably assuming childhood texts continue to apply.

Tony Atwood's Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome is very comprehensive, but is a large tome, and mostly about children.

Sometimes a biography can help. Jon Elder Robison's Look me in the eye - my life with Asperger's, while an American perspective, is positive and up beat.

Marc Fleisher's Making Sense of the Unfeasible, again relating to aspergers, contains a lot of insight into teenage years and early adulthood. However it is very specific to one person's experiences not always easy for others to relate to.

Most books are published by Jessica Kingsley Publishers and you should be able to access their publication lists on line.

It is likely though that others will soon respond with their recommendations. The validity of books on autism is often discussed in here and you may find useful past discussions.