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Feeling abit "lost" after diagnosis

NinjaPanda85

Hi all,

Got diagnoised with Autism nearly 2 weeks ago (male 41 years old), waiting for the diagnostic report to get to me and Doctors in about a months time. 

Just feeling abit "lost" in terms of next steps and hope best to progress post diagnosis. I have done some basic research on Autism, but theres so much information out there (im aware not all good oreliable) it can feel overwhelming just thinking about looking into it more.  My diagnosis was validation of lifelong difficulties that did not fit another catergory(or the fact i never really fit in periodRofl) but also came with some sadness that it was not picked up on sooner and thus perhaps missing out on some better support and understanding. 

Its been a big year for me with medical retirement(not my choice) from a 16 year career i loved but couldnt do anymore as it was making me  ill and making existing conditions worse. Combined with my autism diagnosis, feels like a big year.

So currently im 41, retired but trying to find suitable work to help me recover from everything , whilst feeling like my world is flipped over to an extent. Also trying to figure out what my autism diagnosis means for work prospects and reasonable adjustments.

Suppose i am just trying to find my way again.

Sorry for the vent, thanks to those taking the time to read.

Parents

  • I was 50 when diagnosed, so I get why you're feeling unsettled and a bit at sea. I think many of us latelings as we call oursleves to differentiatate ourselves from those diagnosed earlier in life, wonder why we weren't picked up earlier when it seems so obvious now. I think people are just far more aware of autism now than they were even 15 years ago and realising that it dosen't just happen in childhood and its not something you grow out of either.

    I think the best thing I can suggest is that you just sit with this new knowlege about yourself for a while, weeks, months, years if needed, don't beat yourself up if emotions come up and you feel hurt by old memories, it's just that now you're looking at your life again with an autistic lens. Talk to people, professionals friends or family, whoever feels safest about how you're feeling. If you feel a bit raw then be careful who you tell, its up to you, you don't have to tell anyone if you don't want to, or you may chose to be totally out with it, like I did and do.

    Allow yourself to grieve for the career you've had to give up and the struggles you've had in life, it's normal and I think we all feel it.

    You've made a good start, you're here, among others like yourself, and we're all different, with different skills, likes, dislikes and things that excite us and give us the ick. Most of the time everyones tame and don't have a go at each other, unless like me you admit to liking cold potato, gherkin and mayo sandwiches, lol.

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  • I was 50 when diagnosed, so I get why you're feeling unsettled and a bit at sea. I think many of us latelings as we call oursleves to differentiatate ourselves from those diagnosed earlier in life, wonder why we weren't picked up earlier when it seems so obvious now. I think people are just far more aware of autism now than they were even 15 years ago and realising that it dosen't just happen in childhood and its not something you grow out of either.

    I think the best thing I can suggest is that you just sit with this new knowlege about yourself for a while, weeks, months, years if needed, don't beat yourself up if emotions come up and you feel hurt by old memories, it's just that now you're looking at your life again with an autistic lens. Talk to people, professionals friends or family, whoever feels safest about how you're feeling. If you feel a bit raw then be careful who you tell, its up to you, you don't have to tell anyone if you don't want to, or you may chose to be totally out with it, like I did and do.

    Allow yourself to grieve for the career you've had to give up and the struggles you've had in life, it's normal and I think we all feel it.

    You've made a good start, you're here, among others like yourself, and we're all different, with different skills, likes, dislikes and things that excite us and give us the ick. Most of the time everyones tame and don't have a go at each other, unless like me you admit to liking cold potato, gherkin and mayo sandwiches, lol.

Children
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