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Girlfriends

Moxey

My 17 year old son has just been dumped by his first love. He is devastated!! Have told him not to get too involved but I know that he will and this will happen many more times. I don't know how to protect him or prepare him for adult life. He is still in school and doing ok but it's a constant effort keeping him grounded! i feel an emotional mess. 

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  • Former Member
    Former Member

    Moxey said:

    He also asked me should I tell her that I have asbergers when they started going out. I really don't know the answer to that question! He did but now thinks that is the reason she broke it off. I want him to feel normal( hate that word) but he finds it hard to hold anything back. He is too truthful sometimes!!

    It is hard to hold this sort of thing back for an aspie. In the long run it is much better that she knows rather than not. I doubt that the label should put her off - he can say that there are lots of famous scientists who are very aspie but this may not impress a lot of girls I guess. It may be that his social skills are unpolished and that he said things out of turn. Reassure him that there are other fish in the sea and that 99.9% of first romances end up in one side or the other being dumped.

    I agree with Narra, it takes a bit longer, it is harder doing all of this as an aspie but in the end it can be done successfully.

    Has he looked at books on the subject? There is a section about dating etc in Living Well on the Spectrum by Valerie Gaus.

    PS Aspergers is spelled with a P

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  • Former Member
    Former Member

    Moxey said:

    He also asked me should I tell her that I have asbergers when they started going out. I really don't know the answer to that question! He did but now thinks that is the reason she broke it off. I want him to feel normal( hate that word) but he finds it hard to hold anything back. He is too truthful sometimes!!

    It is hard to hold this sort of thing back for an aspie. In the long run it is much better that she knows rather than not. I doubt that the label should put her off - he can say that there are lots of famous scientists who are very aspie but this may not impress a lot of girls I guess. It may be that his social skills are unpolished and that he said things out of turn. Reassure him that there are other fish in the sea and that 99.9% of first romances end up in one side or the other being dumped.

    I agree with Narra, it takes a bit longer, it is harder doing all of this as an aspie but in the end it can be done successfully.

    Has he looked at books on the subject? There is a section about dating etc in Living Well on the Spectrum by Valerie Gaus.

    PS Aspergers is spelled with a P

Children
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