Paranoia

I can feel like everyone is looking at me and judging me in certain situations. I’m usually okay just out and about or if I have my uniform on for work, but parties, pubs, restaurants, shops, anywhere with more than a few people I begin to feel like everyone is staring at me because of how I look, or move. Then I feel like the way I walk or talk is very awkward and I have to concentrate hard to not lose myself in my head. Written down this makes me look completely unhinged, but it’s always been like this for me. 

Yes, I think this is a bit similar to how I feel. But for me it's partly that I don't feel awkward in my own mind , I feel like I'm fine in my own head, so I don't get why others look at me askance as if I look really weird. I've been told it might be my expression or body language/the way I walk. But they all feel like they're the same as others to me, so I don't get what others are seeing. ️

Yes, I think this is a bit similar to how I feel. But for me it's partly that I don't feel awkward in my own mind , I feel like I'm fine in my own head, so I don't get why others look at me askance as if I look really weird. I've been told it might be my expression or body language/the way I walk. But they all feel like they're the same as others to me, so I don't get what others are seeing. ️

My brother always talked to himself and even got attacked in Birmingham. He took up martial arts and the last I heard was a brown belt. He still talks to himself, people still laugh but he ignores them - because at the dojo he learned self control and never to attack anyone. So I consider him the better person.

Hmm it’s hard to work out. Once someone shouted very loudly at me ‘dungarees!’ But I think they were high on something. 

When I have asked friends, they just give vague answers. I'm not obviously different, physically, in fact very boring looking ,and without wishing to pass any judgement I see many people who look very much more 'unusual' than me eg dyed hair or unusual clothes  but don't see them being glanced at as I am. So I don't know what the key factor is, it feels illogical 

Have you got anyone in your life who you could trust to be honest with you and tell you if you do anything unusual? 
I talk to myself out loud in public sometimes but I know I’m doing it. When I feel I’m being looked at by other people I find I don’t walk easily and I can feel exactly what my hands and arms are doing and it becomes something I think about rather than automatic, urgh.