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Conflicted about work

profdanger

So I am stuck in a weird situation. I currently work as an employment specialist, where I work with people with disabilities find and keep employment, and this job is working out pretty great for me. But I just found a job working with LGBTQ+ youth in my area that sounds just as, if not more, great. Both jobs have the same net pay, both have benefits, and both are in the same town. One big difference is the LGBTQ+ one is part-time, so less hours for the same net pay. However, I’ll still list the positives and negatives of both jobs:

DISABILITIES EMPLOYMENT SPECIALIST
Pros: Using my Autism as a resource, great coworkers, stable position, personal office, good/flexible hours, 
Cons: Sometimes I deal with intense behaviors (ex. shouting, punching, etc), pressure is high to find jobs in a timely manner, lots of traveling in my car, sometimes I take work home with me (some clients like to call/text me after working hours)

LGBTQ+ CLIENT SPECIALIST
Pros: Something I’ve dreamed of doing for a while now, three day weekends, possibility of picking up another part-time job, less traveling, likely less calls after work
Cons: Might be evenings (which could interfere with raising my kids), unknown about coworkers/office/stability, possibly need to plan events/activities, leaving my current job will leave a LOT of chaos for my current coworkers

So according to me? It’s a tie. I still need to get an official interview for the LGBTQ+ job, so maybe that would answer some of my concerns about stability and such, but right now I’m really torn. My wife is leaning towards employment specialist because we know it works and she is worried about me being absent four nights of the week. Do you have any advice or insight I could use?

Parents

  • The fact you are looking and considering it at all shows you are not really happy with your current position. A 3 day weekend is cool and gives rune to recover. Whenever I take days off and do 4 day weeks I always feel better 

    Same money for less work sounds ideal, but is there a reason? Is it intense on the other days? I expect you may have just as much emotional content. I would think there will be more topics and behaviours to cover than just employment.

    I'd make sure you fully understand what the new role requires and what the responsibilities are.

    Do what you think will be the most fulfilling, which is basically the one that is easiest to get out of bed for in the morning and the one you would be happiest to tell other people about.

  • in reply to Stuart333
    Stuart333 said:
    The fact you are looking and considering it at all shows you are not really happy with your current position

    Yeah… I wouldn’t say I’m 100% happy with the job. I don’t like the uncertainty of whether one of my clients will go off or call me after hours. But otherwise I feel like I’m doing a good job and I feel like an important member of the company. I also enjoy helping people that need help. So yeah… it’s tough to say but I am a little unhappy with my current job.

    Stuart333 said:
    Same money for less work sounds ideal, but is there a reason?

    EXACTLY what I was wondering. I know I might have to deal with suicidal people (which I have attempted before so I feel prepared for that), so I know there’s potential for drama and intense conversations. But yeah, why is it paying $5.5 more per hour than my current position? Maybe I am really underpaid?

    Stuart333 said:

    I'd make sure you fully understand what the new role requires and what the responsibilities are.

    Do what you think will be the most fulfilling, which is basically the one that is easiest to get out of bed for in the morning and the one you would be happiest to tell other people about.

    This is packed with good advice, thank you. Easiest to get out of bed? Probably the new job. Happiest to tell others about? Probably my current job. I imagine I’ll have difficulty telling my far right family members that I help LGBTQ+ folk lol.

  • in reply to profdanger

    Put aside the money, even if it were loads more you quickly get used to it. The issue is really whether the reward will outweigh the hassle on the bad days. Helping people is rewarding. Bring unable to help or stuck on the middle is frustrating. Having responsibility without empowerment is the definition of stress.

    On the plus side being able to relate to how people feel can be helpful. But they can lean on you. Maintaining professional boundaries and not getting involved is hard. It pulls you apart. Particularly if you have lots of empathy. I couldn't do it, it causes me problems. I wouldn't want to let people down. But I don't understand what the role entails 

    Perhaps you know this. Maybe the problems are mostly mundane housing, financial and other routine everyday issues. But if the intense stuff is frequent it would be hard to avoid getting invested or becoming a bit cold.

    I'd also look at the other people who you would be with. They are the ones who could support you. Are they happy or fried.

  • in reply to profdanger

    This is what I was trying to hint at. If you find it hard being the middle man just on jobs, what if you get involved in far more. Does the job cover relationship or emotional guidance, abuse, counselling advice, housing, STIs, employment, rights, discrimination guidance, etc?

    This provides many more areas for stress. This is why I can imagine professional boundaries are important. 

    But it may just be handing out pre-prepared leaflets with information. Which is why I mentioned finding out about the exact scope and responsibilities. It is hard to tell.

    You need to consider yourself. You don't want to end up overwhelmed. But you could also be ideal. I can't tell, I don't know your abilities. Pushing yourself a bit is how you grow.

    The fact you are asking here makes me think you are nervous about it.  The only way to know is to go and talk to them.

  • in reply to Stuart333
    Stuart333 said:
    Helping people is rewarding. Bring unable to help or stuck on the middle is frustrating. Having responsibility without empowerment is the definition of stress.

    Which is exactly why I find my current job so hard. I can’t control the job market, so some of my clients get jobs right away while others have to wait excruciating months. I take the latter very personally, though I try not to.

    Honestly? It sounds like you’d be able to do my job very well. Yeah, having a lot of empathy can be a hard thing to deal with in this line of work, but you absolutely need empathy to be successful in what I do.

Reply
  • in reply to Stuart333
    Stuart333 said:
    Helping people is rewarding. Bring unable to help or stuck on the middle is frustrating. Having responsibility without empowerment is the definition of stress.

    Which is exactly why I find my current job so hard. I can’t control the job market, so some of my clients get jobs right away while others have to wait excruciating months. I take the latter very personally, though I try not to.

    Honestly? It sounds like you’d be able to do my job very well. Yeah, having a lot of empathy can be a hard thing to deal with in this line of work, but you absolutely need empathy to be successful in what I do.

Children
  • in reply to profdanger

    This is what I was trying to hint at. If you find it hard being the middle man just on jobs, what if you get involved in far more. Does the job cover relationship or emotional guidance, abuse, counselling advice, housing, STIs, employment, rights, discrimination guidance, etc?

    This provides many more areas for stress. This is why I can imagine professional boundaries are important. 

    But it may just be handing out pre-prepared leaflets with information. Which is why I mentioned finding out about the exact scope and responsibilities. It is hard to tell.

    You need to consider yourself. You don't want to end up overwhelmed. But you could also be ideal. I can't tell, I don't know your abilities. Pushing yourself a bit is how you grow.

    The fact you are asking here makes me think you are nervous about it.  The only way to know is to go and talk to them.