Irritating neighbours

Do you have neighbours who annoy the heck out of you?

Back in the summer, I received an unexpected visit from my council housing officer and one of her colleagues. The reason being that a complaint had been made to the council about the state of my garden. Furthermore, the complainant had also contacted the MP for my area, which had resulted in the MP putting pressure on the council to get their tenant (me) to sort out their neglected and overgrown eyesore of a garden.

My son had been with me when this visit took place. Although the housing officer could not tell us who the complainant was, my son and I were both 99.9% sure that the complainant was a particular neighbour of ours who has a reputation for being a bit of a bully.

Fortunately for me, my local council know that I can struggle physically. It was made clear that if I was perfectly able-bodied, the pressure being applied by the MP would have resulted in the council pursuing the legal route and taking me to court. That said, if I was perfectly able-bodied, it's unlikely that I would have allowed my garden to end up becoming an eyesore.

It wasn't the complaint as such that irked me, but the fact that the complainant had not considered the option of sharing their concerns about my garden with me first. I'm not an unreasonable person, or at least I don't think I am. 

I have what I consider to be a good rapport with the rest of my neighbours, but it seems like this one particular neighbour seems to take great delight in trying to antagonise and intimidate anyone and everyone to get what he wants. As my son said, if the state of my garden was causing the neighbour distress, there was nothing stopping them from going down the neighbourly route and offering to help me get it sorted.

Parents
  • Ugh I know I’m taking a break or said I would but I need to rant here. Omg I can’t take it with next door anymore I’m fed up of that brat kid crying whenever he sees me! EVERYTIME he walks past he asked why the old lady before isn’t living there anymore. Fed up of him banging and ruining my new door and now he’s even throwing and kicking balls on my window! The fact no one tells him off or anything! Must I be reminded I’m the world ugliest person? It’s easy to act like I don’t care but when I’m alone I end up crying I’m wanting to cry now! I want to report and complain but I’m worried I’ll get in a worse situation! What is it with kids born from 2013 onwards as to why they hate me? Andwhy do their parents and relatives hate me? Sorry I’m really struggling now

  • This was a tough read, so I cannot imagine how hard it is to actually live through it. 

    I can see you have a had some helpful responses.

    I just want to add that you are not the world's ugliest person. You are a warm hearted, beautiful soul, just the kind of person genuine people look for in a friend/partner. Don't let a few ignorant people change who you are.

    Remember you are listening when you are saying those awful things about yourself. It can be very damaging. I am only now trying to erase the narrative my parents kept telling me about myself that wasn't true.

    Be kind and gentle with yourself you are coping with so much.

    I hope things settle down for you.

    (⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠)⁠Heart

  • Hiya   sorry I have only seen your message as well! Thank you so much for replying to me though! I really appreciate the lovely advice and kind words, they have really helped me, I just hope one day I’ll feel more positive about myself and more confident and able to ignore what the haters think. Those few people who have been mean to me feel more than a few especially when I’m really upset if that makes sense, guess this is where grounding comes in. Had issues with the neighbours again today and everyone in my block thinks I’m a spoilt brat, despite I’ve been the kind one taking their parcels in and all I get is abuse. And I’m apparently the one who is thinking and acting unkindly, I can say they are the unkind ones though if you ask me. Sorry for my little rant. 

    As for the feeling ugly thing, well him next door makes me feel awful how he cries and screams at the sight of me, but also because I’ve been picked on for not going for Botox or under the knife or whatever. I don’t have plump lips or that and my face isn’t a v shaped, it’s just who I am. 

  • Aww thank you! Relaxed️ it defo helps 

  • Well, it's clear that everyone here who responded already does both.

  • Thank you so much! Relaxed️ hopefully one day people will like and respect me for who I am. 

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