How do I explain me to my parents?

I was diagnosed with ASD and ADHD around 9-10 years ago and have gotten plenty of support (therapists, social/support worker, etc) but my parents still don't seem to comprehend what my being autistic actually means... for example, I just can't cope with certain sounds and I can't have a shower without washing my hair but no matter how hard I try, they won't believe me when I tell them and when I provide proof from sites on the subject, I'm hit with "don't believe everything you read on the internet."

Parents
  • no matter how hard I try, they won't believe me

    Who would they believe?

    If the answer is no-one then you will have to learn to live with this denial unfortunately.

    One thing to consider is that autism is highly hereditary so there is a strong chance one or both parents are also on the spectrum, and autists can be incredibly stubborn in their thinking.

    I think  has a good idea of getting a professional to tell them that your issues with sound are real although I'm not sure that the need for washing hair when having a shower is an autistic trait or an OCD one. It may be worth discussing further with your therapist as there can be ways to address OCD traits if they are troublesome.

    You could also consider some emotional warfare if you want to (not really ethical I guess but it is effective) and tell your parents that you are really dissapointed in them that they do not believe you and it hurts your feelings. Masking / Scripting to present this and get the breakthrough you need COULD be considered justification enough for this underhand tactic - I'll let you decide if this is of interest or not.

Reply
  • no matter how hard I try, they won't believe me

    Who would they believe?

    If the answer is no-one then you will have to learn to live with this denial unfortunately.

    One thing to consider is that autism is highly hereditary so there is a strong chance one or both parents are also on the spectrum, and autists can be incredibly stubborn in their thinking.

    I think  has a good idea of getting a professional to tell them that your issues with sound are real although I'm not sure that the need for washing hair when having a shower is an autistic trait or an OCD one. It may be worth discussing further with your therapist as there can be ways to address OCD traits if they are troublesome.

    You could also consider some emotional warfare if you want to (not really ethical I guess but it is effective) and tell your parents that you are really dissapointed in them that they do not believe you and it hurts your feelings. Masking / Scripting to present this and get the breakthrough you need COULD be considered justification enough for this underhand tactic - I'll let you decide if this is of interest or not.

Children