Saying and doing the wrong thing!

Hi Wolfbear,

Thank-you so much for your informative reply, It means a lot to me that I can correspond with someone who understands the world from my sons perspective and who will share information with me that will in turn support him.

My son is 13 and was diagnosed about 3months ago with aspergers and dyslexia. A few weeks after this I mentioned to him that his mood was rather good lately and was it because he was off on school holidays? He replied “ No, its because I know now that I have aspergers and so will everyone else”  he now knows there is a reason for the things in life he was having difficulties with. He talked about the literal meaning to things and that life would be much better for him if no-one used sarcasm. I am working very hard to try and stop using it. Do you think it would help to try and teach him some examples? Today I was trying to explain to him the difference of saying to someone “your sickened” and “that’s sickenin” (teenage talk here) trying to explain that one term could be offensive and the other one not. he got bored of me explaining and said it didn’t matter its all the same. then I was finding it frustrating!

I now understand better regarding the lift after reading your reply. over the last few days the incident keeps reappearing, especially before bedtime, even last night we went over it all again…the “ what if no-one heard me in there and no-one found me” scenario. I will now have more tolerance when repeating the same happy ending no matter what happened in that lift, to him. The worst thing was he didn’t get into a lift until he was 9yrs old as he was frightened too, even as a toddler he didn’t like them but with persistence and determination on his part he eventually did.   

You asked if he is a visual thinker, he is, in fact when he was assessed the lady said to me that in the visual assessment he got the highest score she had ever seen, and he was going so fast she could barely keep up only scoring 4 wrong, he said that was because he pressed the wrong button by accident. I also discovered that day that he watches things in his mind like watching a film, his long term memory is great, the short term not so good. The sad thing though is that he is finding school work difficult. At least we understand why now and that helps him. He is an intelligent boy but it just doesn’t flow through to his school work as he finds a lot of it frustrating, which is an awful shame because I know its in there, its just trying to find a way that brings out his potential. If you have any thoughts on this I would be grateful for them.

I feel like I could talk for hours, so I am going to stop now because I am sure that is more than enough information for one evening,

Thanks again

De-De

Hi Wolfbear,

Thank-you so much for your informative reply, It means a lot to me that I can correspond with someone who understands the world from my sons perspective and who will share information with me that will in turn support him.

My son is 13 and was diagnosed about 3months ago with aspergers and dyslexia. A few weeks after this I mentioned to him that his mood was rather good lately and was it because he was off on school holidays? He replied “ No, its because I know now that I have aspergers and so will everyone else”  he now knows there is a reason for the things in life he was having difficulties with. He talked about the literal meaning to things and that life would be much better for him if no-one used sarcasm. I am working very hard to try and stop using it. Do you think it would help to try and teach him some examples? Today I was trying to explain to him the difference of saying to someone “your sickened” and “that’s sickenin” (teenage talk here) trying to explain that one term could be offensive and the other one not. he got bored of me explaining and said it didn’t matter its all the same. then I was finding it frustrating!

I now understand better regarding the lift after reading your reply. over the last few days the incident keeps reappearing, especially before bedtime, even last night we went over it all again…the “ what if no-one heard me in there and no-one found me” scenario. I will now have more tolerance when repeating the same happy ending no matter what happened in that lift, to him. The worst thing was he didn’t get into a lift until he was 9yrs old as he was frightened too, even as a toddler he didn’t like them but with persistence and determination on his part he eventually did.   

You asked if he is a visual thinker, he is, in fact when he was assessed the lady said to me that in the visual assessment he got the highest score she had ever seen, and he was going so fast she could barely keep up only scoring 4 wrong, he said that was because he pressed the wrong button by accident. I also discovered that day that he watches things in his mind like watching a film, his long term memory is great, the short term not so good. The sad thing though is that he is finding school work difficult. At least we understand why now and that helps him. He is an intelligent boy but it just doesn’t flow through to his school work as he finds a lot of it frustrating, which is an awful shame because I know its in there, its just trying to find a way that brings out his potential. If you have any thoughts on this I would be grateful for them.

I feel like I could talk for hours, so I am going to stop now because I am sure that is more than enough information for one evening,

Thanks again

De-De