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If someone told you they thought they might be autistic, what questions would you ask them?

Oran G. Utan

I had a recent conversation with my father, who speculated that because I was autistic, he could well be too. He doesn't feel the need to get tested as he was told by mental health workers that with his level of functionality and lifestyle, there would be no purpose in a diagnosis. It got me to wondering, what would be some simple questions one might ask to find signs of neurodivergency? If you had to boil it down to just a few that could fit into a normal conversation, that is.

For me, the only thing that comes to mind is "When you go to bed at night, do you find you usually settle in and nod off before long? Or do you find yourself lying awake, full of thoughts, left waiting for sleep to happen?"

Parents

  • I would just say take some autism tests. The level of variation between autistic people is so vast that pinning anyone down as autistic through a small number of questions is not realistic. For example, except when very stressed by something, I tend to sleep from about 10:30pm to 6:00am each night, I am a diagnosed autistic, while my allistic wife has always had appallingly bad sleep and attends a sleep clinic.

  • in reply to Martin

    Fair. Though, if I were to use my father as an example again, he's barely literate and has hardly the time to visit the doctor over known health conditions. So he's unlikely to take time out of his day to take tests, especially when he's been told a diagnosis wouldn't entitle him to anything. I'm sure there are others like that who need some assurance that taking time out of their busy schedules to take tests would be worth it.

    That's why I wonder what would be conversational ways to find signs of neurodivergency in adults. Not to a "Yes you are/No you're not" result of course, because as you say, there's no way to be that certain. I know a  few people who think they might be neurodivergent, but would find taking tests challenging due to personal or environmental difficulties. My two best friends, one who thinks she might have ADD, and another who shows signs of autism, are generally very untrusting. And very American. Neither can really afford to get tested. Which is why I feel a diagnosed ND person like myself whom they do trust might at least be able to give them some peace of mind if I knew what to look for, in what short amount of patience I could squeeze out of them Sweat smile

  • in reply to Oran G. Utan

    read out the questions?

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