my adult son will be tested for autism.

Hi NAS92667

I too have a 30-year-old son. my son is currently undiagnosed. He is a troubled soul and has struggled through life at times.  

Strangely I hadn't spotted his potentially autistic behaviours until he was probably mid 20's.  I think I have worked out why.  He was always very bright... gifted and talented through his school career. It wasn't until he reached around 16 that I found him more challenging to relate to. I guess puberty is a time where masking might be harder to do.

Up until his teenage years I think I thought he was shy, awkward, never quite comfortable in his own skin. 

We have gone thorugh the mental health system for diagnosises in the past ... which have been shockingly damaging.  One Consultant told him when he was 19 that he was a parasite on the back of his parents.

He is now apparently in the cue for diagnosis around autism/neurodivergence but we have already waited months, maybe years. 

I can relate to your feelings of guilt about your sons lifelong stuggles. I dont know if it is the same for you, but I also beat myself up regulary about the times when the communication between us gets messed up.  It isnt easy navigating things.

I hope your son gets the help he needs and you get the support you need too

Amanda x

Hi NAS92667

I too have a 30-year-old son. my son is currently undiagnosed. He is a troubled soul and has struggled through life at times.  

Strangely I hadn't spotted his potentially autistic behaviours until he was probably mid 20's.  I think I have worked out why.  He was always very bright... gifted and talented through his school career. It wasn't until he reached around 16 that I found him more challenging to relate to. I guess puberty is a time where masking might be harder to do.

Up until his teenage years I think I thought he was shy, awkward, never quite comfortable in his own skin. 

We have gone thorugh the mental health system for diagnosises in the past ... which have been shockingly damaging.  One Consultant told him when he was 19 that he was a parasite on the back of his parents.

He is now apparently in the cue for diagnosis around autism/neurodivergence but we have already waited months, maybe years. 

I can relate to your feelings of guilt about your sons lifelong stuggles. I dont know if it is the same for you, but I also beat myself up regulary about the times when the communication between us gets messed up.  It isnt easy navigating things.

I hope your son gets the help he needs and you get the support you need too

Amanda x