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Socialising difficulties

Mason

Last Saturday I went away with some people for a friends 30th birthday and I was very apprehensive about it, I didn't know 3 out of 5 of the girls So I didn't know quite what to expect. ive been trying to make friends because I don't have any that live near me but they aren't very like me and they just like going out drinking which I really don't like at all. I decided to make an effort by going an putting up with it but I don't think it was a good idea, the other girls were very rude and I found them difficult to talk to. They wanted to play drinking games which I hate and I didn't play, so they probable didn't like me for that either. I'm light and sound sensitive so I dont like night clubs and I hate people constantly banging into me too and guys messing around and staring at us it makes me uncomfortable. I found them difficult to talk to, even more than usual because they wern't very intelligent at all and made silly unintelligible comments and asked questions which I would answer properly, but then I feel uncomfortable because I don't think they were meaning for me to actually answer them 'scientifically'. I guess we were very different people and they just didn't understand me.

ive no idea why we even went there because they didn't want to see anything of the place, I like the cultural things and going to museums and galleries and they really don't, they just like drinking and that's it. 

what do other people do about these socialising problems? I ended up getting very stressed and 'having a go' at one of my friends because they kept letting random drunk guys into our hotel room and I didn't like it. I don't know how she's taken it and whether she's offended by it or not. I'll have to wait and see the next time I have a shift with her.

Parents

  • I can relate to that post on aspects of aspergers! Having been to uni and socialising with work friends too, I sometimes have had to make myself go out like last weekend to help build friendships. I would however only stay out for as long as I felt comfortable enough to, I would leave much earlier than everyone else. I could deal with the pub and bar environment easier than a club. my worst thing in clubs is strobe lighting, it kills my eyes and if they put it on I leave and go home And the music is so loud, and too many people all bumping into me, it's very stressful.

    This time though, I was with people who didn't understand me or know my quirky ways like that and in a place where I couldn't just go home. That was a big problem for me. The people not being nice didn't help at all either. i would take IntenseWorlds advice and get new friends but I moved home over a year ago and these are the only actual friends I've managed to make, I get on with people from work, but I don't go out with them and to be honest they're all the same, they all go out clubbing every weekend and it's all they want to do.

    I find it hard to meet people so I try to make an effort sometimes but I think this time it back-fired a bit. I would go with this girls again, unfortunately though I notice this socialising thing only works one way. I have to go out to bars and clubs with them, but they don't have to come to museums, galleries and similar cultural and fun things with me... A bit unfair really!

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  • I can relate to that post on aspects of aspergers! Having been to uni and socialising with work friends too, I sometimes have had to make myself go out like last weekend to help build friendships. I would however only stay out for as long as I felt comfortable enough to, I would leave much earlier than everyone else. I could deal with the pub and bar environment easier than a club. my worst thing in clubs is strobe lighting, it kills my eyes and if they put it on I leave and go home And the music is so loud, and too many people all bumping into me, it's very stressful.

    This time though, I was with people who didn't understand me or know my quirky ways like that and in a place where I couldn't just go home. That was a big problem for me. The people not being nice didn't help at all either. i would take IntenseWorlds advice and get new friends but I moved home over a year ago and these are the only actual friends I've managed to make, I get on with people from work, but I don't go out with them and to be honest they're all the same, they all go out clubbing every weekend and it's all they want to do.

    I find it hard to meet people so I try to make an effort sometimes but I think this time it back-fired a bit. I would go with this girls again, unfortunately though I notice this socialising thing only works one way. I have to go out to bars and clubs with them, but they don't have to come to museums, galleries and similar cultural and fun things with me... A bit unfair really!

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