How do you make friends?

Friendship comes through multiple contacts over time.  You don't just make friends.  You make acquaintances, then you maybe go out for a beer or something, talk, maybe have something in common and if you can tolerate each other enough, you might achieve friendship.  That's the shortened version.  You have to invest in them and they in you.  Kind of like the next level beyond that, relationships.  Which is basically friendship with extra perks.  You invest more time and get more things out of it.

So doing the above aas a NT is very hard, according to people i know.  Doing it as ND is so much harder.

A guy I talk to at the gym said "be kind" and I hear that a lot.  So maybe try that.  But don't get taken advantage of.  You also need to be proactive.  So i don't think social clubs are the answer, i'll be blunt on that.  You go to a place and it will be full of groups people that have already created there own friendship circles, then you have to try and break into them.  Why waste energy on it.  You need to find something where everyone is entering at the same level, where no one probably knows each other.  That will increase your chances. 

So for instance, go and learn a language at a community centre.  You will have to be social to do that and you will meet people, interact with others, probably have a good laugh and that may be the first step.  Even if you don't get the joke (I never do generally).  It's not so much about the learning the language, it's the sense of community and meeting new people and helping each other.  These are kind of the starting block for finding friends.  Once people see you for who you are and you start meeting and socialising outside of the class, that's when you will find them.

Friendship comes through multiple contacts over time.  You don't just make friends.  You make acquaintances, then you maybe go out for a beer or something, talk, maybe have something in common and if you can tolerate each other enough, you might achieve friendship.  That's the shortened version.  You have to invest in them and they in you.  Kind of like the next level beyond that, relationships.  Which is basically friendship with extra perks.  You invest more time and get more things out of it.

So doing the above aas a NT is very hard, according to people i know.  Doing it as ND is so much harder.

A guy I talk to at the gym said "be kind" and I hear that a lot.  So maybe try that.  But don't get taken advantage of.  You also need to be proactive.  So i don't think social clubs are the answer, i'll be blunt on that.  You go to a place and it will be full of groups people that have already created there own friendship circles, then you have to try and break into them.  Why waste energy on it.  You need to find something where everyone is entering at the same level, where no one probably knows each other.  That will increase your chances. 

So for instance, go and learn a language at a community centre.  You will have to be social to do that and you will meet people, interact with others, probably have a good laugh and that may be the first step.  Even if you don't get the joke (I never do generally).  It's not so much about the learning the language, it's the sense of community and meeting new people and helping each other.  These are kind of the starting block for finding friends.  Once people see you for who you are and you start meeting and socialising outside of the class, that's when you will find them.