This Christmas for me like many others has been both horrible and wonderful. Reading here a lot of you have had similar experiences.
It seems to be the same for the neurotypicals to a large extent.
As an older person, I remember different (not better, overall just different) Christmasses where the Christian message was "in your face" and most people thought that was O.K. really, unrealistic perhaps but O.K. and good ideal, etc.
We accepted that in order to be able to celebrate properly that we all needed to work together to get presents sorted out during Christmas week A.K.A. the run up to Christmas, some of us like me and my dad "just needed help" fetch food and generally prepare, and that operations were directed and produced by the women and men were effectively the executive arm, and shunted off to the pub so as things could be done easier on Christmas morning. Those of us of a lazier or greedier nature were encouraged to "just this once give a bit more" and genuinely for a few short hours there was a real sense of Unity, and for most of us a vague sense of higher more spiritual levels to existence. It was a time when we could all, briefly, be better than 1970's English people normally managed, and was indeed, special...
Most of my generation, the "boomers", of course discarded the religion, and concentrated on the "presents" and the "drinking" and watching the "Christmas War film" (remember those, anyone?) and that's why Christmas is the way it is today.
For me though, the pressing problem. (I now realise, just as my dad had) is simply being able to manage being in a room with a whole bunch of people interacting continuously, and stay functional and nice. Mellowjian elsewhere refers to it as "being a recluse for a good reason".
For me in the moment this aspect of my Autism is a thing that I am ashamed of. I am surrounded by people all doing their very best to have a good and nice time, and include me as much as I will allow them to. That I need to sit out here with my cat smoking and being alone for longish periods and I feel awkward and stilted without "masking" is not a good thing, or a thing I can be proud of.
Ever since my Diagnosis I've found new reasons for old problems, but very little in the way of actual solutions.
I came here hoping to find a well laid out board where common problems and issues and their solutions or workarounds would be highlighted, with a view to helping people like me, better integrate with the neurotypical majority. Now we find that all work older than three years ago will be summarily deleted, (which is probably a good thing from a CT point of view) meaning that a lot of useful posts by the likes of Deepthought and Juniper form Gallifrey and many others who I could name if I made a bit more effort) will be memory holed.
SURELY a bunch of Autists could have made and curated a useful archive by now...
IN some areas of life, we really do need to find ways of "minimising the Autism" simply to make life nicer for the N.T's as well as expecting them to make adjustments for us.
I don't ever seem to read many posts suggesting that we need to make adjustments to suit the normie majority, and how best to do that. It may be that my basically unpleasant and confrontational ego makes em skip over them, or maybe there really is a lack of effort being made on our part to "fit in" better...
We all need other people, and like it or not they need us.
I am finding that Autism is yet another divisive "-ISM" just like the other ism's that are a part of the I Sperg personality gloopiness and needs to be kept firmly in check and made to be my servant, and not my master.
Does anyone else feel vaguely this way?
