I used to be cuddly and want sex, now I don't like being touched at all.

Happier_in_pjs said:

we were very affectionate. Now I can't stand it.

Sparkly is right in saying that relationships go through phases and sometimes you need to rekindle the spark that brought the affection to your love life.

It is worth taking time to reflect on what is different now. Did you live apart before but now are always in each others spaces? This can lead to resentment that will dampen the romance, but there are ways to work on it.

Has anything else changed for you? It sounds like your husband is still the same, but has anything else changed there that may have turned you off of him? Does he now fart in front of you when he didn't before, does he expect you to do all the housework while he plays games etc? Has he stopped washing as often etc etc?

If you can find that thorn which is throbbing in your paw and causing you to reject the affection then you can start working on it. Talking openly and bluntly about it is a great place to start so you are both on the same page.

From there you need to negotiate a new normal that addresses the root cause of the issue - normally there needs to be give and take on both sides but this is the nature of a stable married life.

One trick to remember is that when you are rejecting him, try to think what it is specifically that you don't want at that time - it can be illuminating.

Happier_in_pjs said:

we were very affectionate. Now I can't stand it.

Sparkly is right in saying that relationships go through phases and sometimes you need to rekindle the spark that brought the affection to your love life.

It is worth taking time to reflect on what is different now. Did you live apart before but now are always in each others spaces? This can lead to resentment that will dampen the romance, but there are ways to work on it.

Has anything else changed for you? It sounds like your husband is still the same, but has anything else changed there that may have turned you off of him? Does he now fart in front of you when he didn't before, does he expect you to do all the housework while he plays games etc? Has he stopped washing as often etc etc?

If you can find that thorn which is throbbing in your paw and causing you to reject the affection then you can start working on it. Talking openly and bluntly about it is a great place to start so you are both on the same page.

From there you need to negotiate a new normal that addresses the root cause of the issue - normally there needs to be give and take on both sides but this is the nature of a stable married life.

One trick to remember is that when you are rejecting him, try to think what it is specifically that you don't want at that time - it can be illuminating.

Haha I'm the gamer in the house. I think it's more he's the breadwinner, I'm stuck at home as I'm quite isolated as I'm easily overwhelmed, i do most of the housework. Ive only recently been diagnosed as well. 

He's not put me off, but he can be very needy and I can feel suffocated at times. I just annoy myself because he's such a good and kind man. I'm struggling to articulate what it is. There's so many things it could be.  I just want those warm feelings back. 

We have lived together for a couple of years and been together for 7 years in total.